Forgot your password?
typodupeerror
Crime

Cops: Accused Vandal Confessed To ChatGPT 59

alternative_right shares a report from the Smoking Gun: Minutes after vandalizing 17 cars in a Missouri college parking lot, a 19-year-old sophomore had a lengthy ChatGPT conversation during which he confessed to the crime, asked about the possibility of getting caught, and wondered, "is there any way they could know it was me," according to a police probable cause statement. Ryan Schaefer was arrested yesterday and charged with felony property damage for a rampage early Sunday at a Missouri State University parking lot. Investigators allege that Schaefer shattered car windows, ripped off side mirrors, dented hoods, and broke windshield wipers during the 3 AM spree.

When confronted with surveillance footage and other evidence, Schaefer said that he could see the resemblance between the suspect and himself. At that point, Schaefer reportedly consented to a search of his iPhone. A subsequent review of the device revealed location data placing Schaefer "at or near the scene of the crime," as well as a "troubling dialogue exchange this defendant seems to have had with artificial intelligence software installed on his phone," prosecutors reported.
The incriminating ChatGPT conversation can be found here.
This discussion has been archived. No new comments can be posted.

Cops: Accused Vandal Confessed To ChatGPT

Comments Filter:
  • by OrangeTide ( 124937 ) on Thursday October 02, 2025 @11:47PM (#65700004) Homepage Journal

    Most people ain't.

    • by ndsurvivor ( 891239 ) on Friday October 03, 2025 @12:03AM (#65700032) Journal
      Reading the conversation, for a 19 year old Sophomore in College, he couldn't spell words, or put together a sentence. He is an idiot. Why is he in College in the first place?
      • by ebunga ( 95613 )

        Well you see, you have to get a college degree to get a job. I mean, you don't, really, but that's the lie that has been sold.

        • by ndsurvivor ( 891239 ) on Friday October 03, 2025 @12:19AM (#65700058) Journal
          When I was in College, in my mind it was just to learn. It was not to skate along, nor to get a job, in my mind it was to shove as much information in my mind that I could. I was paying for the Education, so I hit the books, and that was the purpose.
        • by StormReaver ( 59959 ) on Friday October 03, 2025 @05:39AM (#65700354)

          ...but that's the lie that has been sold.

          It wasn't a lie when I was in college. It was the sole reason I went to college. I applied for many programming jobs in the 1990s, showed my portfolio of free software, got a lot of interest from potential employers because of it, and was uniformly rejected for the SOLE reason of a degree being required for the job.

          I might skip college as a career path nowadays since the return on investment is much lower than it was in the past, and a degree as a job requirement is a bit less prevalent than it used to be.

          • The problem is that the early 1990s were a recession, and you lost to anyone who had a degree and the same programming qualifications. That time sparked the whole "I have a degree in Philosophy," therefore, I beat out everyone else to work at The Gap, creating an education arms race for the menial jobs.
      • by newcastlejon ( 1483695 ) on Friday October 03, 2025 @12:06AM (#65700038)

        Reading the conversation, for a 19 year old Sophomore in College, he couldn't spell words, or put together a sentence. He is an idiot. Why is he in College in the first place?

        Because you have to be 35 to run for president?

      • by abulafia ( 7826 ) on Friday October 03, 2025 @01:06AM (#65700098)
        OK, I normally defend the kids-these-days, observing that at they pretty clearly are on average more well-adjusted and less self-destructive than my cohort was, something reflected in crime stats. But I will bang them on this.

        A lot of the 20-somethings we employ write like this in chat. They're perfectly capable of competently writing more formal documents like functional specs or performance reviews, ditto decent code. But in slack or other chat environments, they type utterly lazy, typo-ridden messes of messages.

        I can see how growing up texting other kids from when you can operate a phone results in... let's call it a highly permissive spelling environment. And it is clearly contextual behavior. But it is jarring.

        • I can understand and forgive talking in one context differently than in other context. A thing that I find jarring (besides the vandalism) is that he would talk intimately to an AI. I know a guy who is talking to his AI and saying personal pronouns when referring it to it, and even calling it his friend. I hope I will never, ever do that.
          • I can understand and forgive talking in one context differently than in other context.

            The context is work so it's not acceptable to half-ass it.

          • I can understand and forgive talking in one context differently than in other context.

            I've had some issues with kids who try to tell me they only use chat. No telephone, no in person meetings. No Dana, only Zuul. No, just no. text messages, can be used for a few things, but they aren't the main way of communicating. And no sensitive or proprietary info ever. Yes, that has been a problem.

            A thing that I find jarring (besides the vandalism) is that he would talk intimately to an AI. I know a guy who is talking to his AI and saying personal pronouns when referring it to it, and even calling it his friend. I hope I will never, ever do that.

            Sad, and creepy. Probably a response to the gestalt of the previous decade or so, where especially young men have found themselves as social and media pariahs. Yet being human, they have a desire for connecti

          • by HiThere ( 15173 )

            My wife used personal pronouns when talking of the car. (OTOH, she also used to say, when driving, "the cars knows the way to" any favorite location.)

            Don't read too much into the use of particular pronouns.

        • OK, I normally defend the kids-these-days, observing that at they pretty clearly are on average more well-adjusted and less self-destructive than my cohort was, something reflected in crime stats. But I will bang them on this.

          A lot of the 20-somethings we employ write like this in chat. They're perfectly capable of competently writing more formal documents like functional specs or performance reviews, ditto decent code. But in slack or other chat environments, they type utterly lazy, typo-ridden messes of messages.

          One of the complaints that employers have about GenZ kids is that they have a lot of trouble communicating, because they use chat-like language in their work. As well as the so called "Get Z stare". Ask a simple question, and they just stare at you, expressionless.

          I personally think it is based on a stress response. Going from college and its safe space atmosphere, and lack of judgement of some groups, and prejudiced judgement of others, discouragement of competition, and where opinions are more important

        • But in slack or other chat environments, they type utterly lazy, typo-ridden messes of messages.

          The problem here isn't the typos (his message wasn't intended to humans, and the AI understood it, so there's really no reason to spend time correcting for spelling). The problem is his inability to summarise his thoughts in a synthetic manner. What he really meant to ask is "What are the criminal penalties for vandalising cars?". But what he asked was:

          How f.ed am I bro? I got back from the worst party at our campus apartment and people were... ( https://www.thesmokinggun.com/... [thesmokinggun.com] (corrections mine)

          which took him effort to type, even full of typos, and serves no purpose in the query.

          I assume his brain was dumbed down by alcohol. Do your programmer colle

      • by Viol8 ( 599362 )

        Even the dumbest homie doesn't spell that incoherently. Looks like me like the assclown was drugged up to his eyeballs.

      • Reading the conversation, for a 19 year old Sophomore in College, he couldn't spell words, or put together a sentence. He is an idiot. Why is he in College in the first place?

        Why are you even still asking that question?

        Let me remind you of the value of those “limiting” entrance exams. Those aren’t mere students anymore. They’re valued customers. And that is exactly how idiots end up in college.

      • Looking at the stuff he posted, it looked more like drunk finger fumbling than not knowing how to spell. The typos were adjacent keys on the keyboard, an example is "qilll I go to jail" The Q happens to be right beside the W on a keyboard, than it would read "willl I go to jail"

        The guy is still an idiot.

      • It was so brutally mistyped that I just assumed he was hammered. It's hard to type when you're blind drunk.
      • I always use proper grammar and spelling. What's with kids these days?

        Now if you will excuse me there are some clouds that need yelling.
      • by JoshZK ( 9527547 )
        It's easy because people think a degree is a substitute for intelligence. That's why I want college to be free for everyone, all the way up to PhDs. The value of degrees will crater as the only thing realistically stopping people is the cost. Sure there's your time but if it's free who cares if it takes longer to get?
      • Why is he in College in the first place?

        One class I would recommend is Intro to Coherent Sentences 101.

      • His school, Missouri State, offers automatic admission if you have a GPA of 3.0 in high school.
        https://www.missouristate.edu/... [missouristate.edu]

      • That's no longer the point of the US education system. That system produces voters. If you want workers, the business needs to educate them.
    • I hop through 3 onions before confessing my thought crimes to ChatGPT. (Or my real crimes involving stealing onions and/or taking a leek.)
    • My all-time favorite teacher back in high school had led an...interesting life. He was the center of a small group of nerds. One of the things he casually said stuck with me: "It's only the dumb criminals who get caught". He was a smart guy, certainly not dumb...

    • Most people ain't.

      Oddly enough, we should be thankful. One of those rare times where a fucking idiot is a strange benefit to society.

      That said, we’ve unlocked a new level of stupid. Kid criminal who grew up in the internet era asking the server with an audit tail wagging in his face if there’s any chance he could get caught. Dare I ask AI just how fucking stupid can we get?

      No. I probably shouldn’t. We’ll just be told that Skynet shit we ironically mocked in sci-fi movies decades ago, is ultimate

      • Most people ain't.

        Oddly enough, we should be thankful. One of those rare times where a fucking idiot is a strange benefit to society.

        That said, we’ve unlocked a new level of stupid. Kid criminal who grew up in the internet era asking the server with an audit tail wagging in his face if there’s any chance he could get caught. Dare I ask AI just how fucking stupid can we get?

        No. I probably shouldn’t. We’ll just be told that Skynet shit we ironically mocked in sci-fi movies decades ago, is ultimately going to be our downfall. Talk about dumb criminals..

        While yes, the kid wasn't all that smart. It's not terribly new. I recall a case where a young lady went online to I think it was Facebook, years ago, and bragged about robbing a convenience store, and flashing the bills around that she stole.

        Criminal stupidity. Pretty common to most criminals

    • by gweihir ( 88907 )

      I would accept "somewhat competent". This person seems to be more on the "special" side.

  • by Gravis Zero ( 934156 ) on Friday October 03, 2025 @01:12AM (#65700106)

    The other half of the story is that the Police officer assigned to the case had a lengthy conversation with ChatGPT before finally asking "is there any way you could solve this case for me?". It was at this point that ChatGPT suggested arresting the 19-year-old sophomore and nearby locations to pick up donuts. :)

  • by bradley13 ( 1118935 ) on Friday October 03, 2025 @02:33AM (#65700190) Homepage
    ...for being able to understand that gibberish. Also: how dumb do you have to be, to not make a chat like that "temporary", or to delete it afterwards?
    • ...make a chat like that "temporary", or to delete it afterwards?

      You seem to be under the impression that those are actual options. They are not. Anything you say to ChatGPT and its ilk remain forever.

      • by allo ( 1728082 )

        Thank the NYT, currently OpenAI has no other option than saving the chats until the court case is over.

        That said, you're right to distrust any cloud and any "deletion" function in commercial products. But for ChatGPT we are *sure* they aren't allowed to delete. If you plan to confess your next crime, you can still use ChatGPT without login in tor browser ... but just don't do crime, no?

    • by gweihir ( 88907 )

      How dumb do you have to be to put evidence of a crime you committed on your PHONE? Or have your phone on you while committing said crime?

    • I wonder if ChatGPT mentioned that one way to get caught would be to have a conversation with a third-party, like an AI, that isn't concerned about protecting his rights.
  • They don't post much of the actual chat, but - there are parts of that I truly can't interpret.

  • by coopertempleclause ( 7262286 ) on Friday October 03, 2025 @05:23AM (#65700336)
    I mean, it's just the most basic rule of crime that you never, under any circumstances, take your smartphone with you.

    He will definitely not be getting the certificate proving he doesn't have donkey brains.
    • Re: (Score:2, Interesting)

      by geekmux ( 1040042 )

      I mean, it's just the most basic rule of crime that you never, under any circumstances, take your smartphone with you.

      Not sure what decade you’re talking to here, but Generation MeMeMe prefers to bet the viral clicks and views will be more than enough to justify the felony lifestyle. Why even bother if you’re not gonna live stream that shit? Fake news otherwise. Never happened.

  • Prisons are filled with stupid criminals.

    The smart ones don't get caught.

  • by markdavis ( 642305 ) on Friday October 03, 2025 @08:30AM (#65700576)

    Stupid: Damaging other people's property
    Stupid: Doing it in an area with cameras
    Stupid: Carrying a phone that is on while doing it
    Stupid: Chatting about it with an online service after doing it
    Stupid: Admitting it looks like you to the police
    Stupid: Consenting to a search

    I am not sure how much more stupid this person could have been.

  • by Anonymous Coward
    This is why you never talk to the police.
  • Apparently, ChatGPT neglected to warn him that consenting to a phone search would be one way the police could suggest it was him? Oopsies, but good riddance.
  • The most impressive part about this whole story is that ChatGPT was able to figure out what he was saying.
  • For a vandal? Exactly how many cars did he take a baseball bat to? It's not a minor thing, but it is also not murder.

    So do they do this for every case? How much money are they spending on tech support?

  • ...If only he had put "asking for a friend.", he would have been fine. lol

As of next week, passwords will be entered in Morse code.

Working...