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Julian Assange May Surrender To British Police On Friday ( 327

bestweasel writes: As reported by The Guardian and others, Julian Assange has announced via Wikileaks that: "Should the UN announce tomorrow that I have lost my case against the United Kingdom and Sweden, I shall exit the embassy at noon on Friday to accept arrest by British police as there is no meaningful prospect of further appeal. ... However, should I prevail and the state parties be found to have acted unlawfully, I expect the immediate return of my passport and the termination of further attempts to arrest me."
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Julian Assange May Surrender To British Police On Friday

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  • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday February 04, 2016 @02:49AM (#51437117)

    1) Claim asylum in Russia.

    2) Menage a trois with Snowden and his lover.

    3) Pressure from conservative Russians to have them imprisoned for being bum-boys.

    4) Putin knows they're too good a fuck-you to the West to bring to harm.

    5) Putin, bareback, rides horse, bareback, into Snowden+Assange love shack, figuring that if you can't beat 'em, beat 'em off.

    6) Homosexuality in Russia decriminalised.

    7) Oligarchs no longer have blackmailable closet secrets on Putin, so he purges them and renationalises the commanding heights of the economy.

    8) Putin is more popular than ever.

    9) Putin renationalises everything else and rebuilds Soviet command structures.

    10) Finland figures it won't get lucky a second time and finally applies to join NATO.

    11) Putin pre-emptively overruns Finland and founds a new Union of Soviert Socialist Republics comprising Russia and Finland.

    12) Stallman is invited to visit Putin, who is keen to implement a single People's Licence for all Soviet intellectual property, and ends up choosing GPL 3.0. Putin makes Stallman an honorary Russian bear, sealing the deal in his Kremlin bedroom.

    13) Torvalds is kidnapped and repatriated to Finland, where he is forced to direct a Russian musical based on Stallman's "The Free Software Song".

    Eh my cat's just jumped on my lap I'm tired now.

    • Forget about all that.
      42) Assange gets a brand new bullet opening his third eye as soon as his head gets out of the embassy.
      • 42) Assange gets a brand new bullet opening his third eye as soon as his head gets out of the embassy.

        I've just realized I honestly don't trust my government not to do that. There was a time I did. I've just seen too many cases of government officials feeling (or actually being) unconstrained by the Constitution and rule of law to believe that they won't disappear/torture/kill Assange. That's depressing, actually.

  • "Oh, sure! Suuuure! We'll stop trying to arrest you! Why don't you come out of that embassy there and... give it a try?" And for some reason I totally hear that in Brock Samson's voice.

    And also, "You guys might want to think about, ah... febreezing that embassy of yours there... it smells like moldy pizza and... Assange crotch."

  • Actually, I don't think they will shoot Assange immediately. I think he will disappear into a black hole of some sort, unless they can use him for a show trial a la Stalin. Doesn't even matter anymore what he did. What matters is putting the fear of gawd into anyone else who is thinking of doing something that causes similar embarrassment to sufficiently rich and powerful people.

    As regards the comments here, I'm not at all surprised to see the attacks on Assange. I just wonder why are they such big fans of

    • I think he will disappear into a black hole of some sort

      Not sure thats possible with the story all over the Internet.

      • by shanen ( 462549 )

        Want to wager on it? We need some metric of disappearance, but I think it is absolutely safe to say the story will not last as long as Snowden's.

        As regards the anonymous and spineless fascist who gave my comment the overrated mod: You're supposed to wait for it to get a mod point. You're only showing your willingness to abuse the rules, such as they are.

        The troll question is actually related to this topic via their abuse of anonymity, but it is again philosophically complicated. I think "troll" is actually

        • by shanen ( 462549 )

          Why did this part of that last reply trigger the so-called lameness filter:

          Now about that meta-modding thing. Years since I had noticed it, and it's just as stupid as it ever was. To evaluate the moderation of a comment, to form ANY meaningful opinion about the moderation, I need CONTEXT. Maybe I'm doing it wrong, but I don't feel like searching in other tabs to see the rest of the thread and the moderation itself is worth the effort, and without the effort, any meta-moderation is worthless. I should have looked for that in the recent discussion of slashdot's future... Make that "possible future".

          Now that is truly bizarre. I cut and pasted the last bit into this new comment so I could figure out which word or words were problematic, but in isolation, there is apparently no problem. I think that is sufficient evidence of the importance of context, eh?

    • Actually, I think that is one of the reasons he tries so hard to stay in the media spotlight, the other being his ego, is that he knows that he can be "disappeared" as soon as the cameras are off.

    • by AmiMoJo ( 196126 )

      Well, we know that GCHQ has a large programme dedicated to altering public opinion on the internet, and has targeted Slashdot in the past with both shills and malware. Thanks to Snowden's leaks we have documentary evidence that they were serving people Slashdot pages laced with custom malware.

      So when there are stories about Assange and Snowden, I tend to assume many of the accounts that come out of the woodwork to comment are just GCHQ shills trying to screw with us.

    • What matters is putting the fear of gawd into anyone else who is thinking of doing something that causes similar embarrassment to sufficiently rich and powerful people.

      Assange's revelations embarrassed the US government and the US military, not "rich people". And you're right: the purpose of a trial and conviction is to act as a deterrent.

      Returning to Assange, I actually think it was his taste in women that was used to set him up. I would say he's losing his freedom for being a sucker, but he actually los

  • This is the organization that put the Saud crime family's minions on their "human rights council".


  • by seoras ( 147590 ) on Thursday February 04, 2016 @05:07AM (#51437445)

    On the BBC just now:

    He probably had someone "leak" that result prior to his "I'll give myself up on Friday", offer.
    As if the UN can change anything...

    • by Rei ( 128717 )

      It's changed one thing: the fact that he said he'll leave the embassy if they rule against him.

      Of course, if Assange is known for anything these past few years it's "keep the focus on me" stunts. Remember the time when he said he'd be leaving the embassy "very soon"? Held a press conference and everything.

      • by Dan667 ( 564390 )
        uh, the US and other countries have been purposely trying to keep the focus on him to keep people from paying attention to their bad behavior Wikileaks has been shedding light on.
  • + In a prison he will walk outdoors every day for an hour.

    - In a prison he will have to eat a food and medications which are given to him. So there could be significant personality changes for a ridiculisation.

    + In the embassy he has got the Internet access.

    - No outdoors walks whatsoever in the embassy. And it is very hard.
    • by Rei ( 128717 )

      The prosecutor's office has already announced that there will be no restrictions on his internet access - there's actually a court ruling on that. That's only for people accused of computer crimes who are deemed a high risk of conducting more from prison, and people who are deemed likely to try to interfere with cases against others from within prison.

  • by gavron ( 1300111 ) on Thursday February 04, 2016 @06:05AM (#51437573)

    Don't expect the authorities to give him back his passport any time ever. []


    • Don't expect the authorities to give him back his passport any time ever.

      He is Australian. As such, he has no automatic right to enter any other country than Australia.

    • by PPH ( 736903 )

      Maybe. This will be a demonstration of just how much of a US sock puppet Australia really is.

  • by Rei ( 128717 )

    Thank YHVH that this expensive ego-driven sideshow will (theoretically) be ending. :P

  • Good luck, Julian. This should be one of the most important topics on Slashdot right now. Win this for yourself, and the rest of us as well.
  • My feeling is that the Us government will eat you alive if you surrender. Please stay inside the embassy. You are a hero to millions of people.
  • A giant all-night Assange look-alike rave at the embassy.

    Thousands of Assanges.

  • ... the online flight resources for a group of Gulfstreams [] and other assorted aircraft.


Take your work seriously but never take yourself seriously; and do not take what happens either to yourself or your work seriously. -- Booth Tarkington