The Web's Worst Privacy Policy 107
Sparrowvsrevolution writes "With much of the web upset over about Google's latest privacy policy changes, it's helpful to remember it could be much worse: A search engine called Skipity offers the world's worst privacy policy (undoubtedly tongue-in-cheek), filled with lines like this: 'You may think of using any of our programs or services as the privacy equivalent of living in a webcam fitted glass house under the unblinking eye of Big Brother: you have no privacy with us. If we can use any of your details to legally make a profit, we probably will.' The policy gives the company the right to sell any of your data that it wants to any and all corporate customers, send you limitless spam, track your movements via GPS if possible, watch you through your webcam, and implant a chip in your body that is subject to reinstallation whenever the company chooses."
Well, at least one company is honest then (Score:5, Funny)
Every time I use Google, I get this unnerving feeling that Larry Page is petting a cat somewhere and telling a henchman "Soon we will have enough to blackmail EVERYONE...bwah, ha, ha, ha!"
Re:Well, at least one company is honest then (Score:5, Insightful)
They already have enough to blackmail everyone.
Re:Well, at least one company is honest then (Score:5, Funny)
They already have enough to blackmail everyone.
They're not already blackmailing everyone?
Crap, I wonder who that I payed that rans^H^H^H^Hdonation to?
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That'd explain how they got Senators and Representatives to drop their support of SOPA/PIPA.
You think it was because of direct grass roots actions?
Re:Well, at least one company is honest then (Score:5, Funny)
I can see it now.
Hello, Senator. I'm glad you could meet with me. I wanted to talk to you about an... anomaly we noticed with your gmail account. It seems that all of those racy emails you've been sending to your intern—you know, the 15-year-old son of your biggest donor—somehow made their way into a mail queue that is scheduled for delivery to your wife and her divorce attorney some time tomorrow.
Now I know what you're thinking. How could this happen? We're not really sure. The point is that it has happened. We can make sure those messages never get delivered by deleting the queue, which we'll do, but we need something from you, too. Good. I'm glad we could come to an understanding.
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They already have enough to blackmail everyone.
Unless all of a sudden a scholarly interest in teenage transsexual prostitutes has become an issue, I'm safe.
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Sorry to be the one to break this to you, but it's quite possible that there are two real racists on Slashdot. Maybe more! In the short term a post may have a silly moderation like that, but over the course of a day or two things will usually average out.
Besides - if you're the original AC, you're the one who is creating multiple accounts for the purposes of shilling and up-modding yourself, so you have no right to complain.
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http://kimvention2012.com/ [kimvention2012.com]
Because it's closer to being the least bit interesting than your waffle.
Re:Well, at least one company is honest then (Score:5, Funny)
They've always been good at it (Score:4, Interesting)
They've always been good at it. They've just been media darlings for so long that they got away with it. But the tide is turning: look at Google Plus Your Search. It's so controversial that Larry Page threatened critical employees that if they didn't like it, they should be working somewhere else.
Google has become another big corporation never happy with the money it's making. Facebook has replaced email and other aspects of the web, and that threatens Google's advertising dollars, which is over 98% of their revenue source.
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Hm, nope, sorry, the frothing at my mouth, the yummy taste of my own bile, and the warm feeling of my blood pressure shooting through the roof disagree with your facts.
Besides, I hate, and as we all know, hate is the only sign of authenticity on teh intarnets. You can't honestly say you like anything unless you're a shill. You know how all those shills like things? Case proven. HATE HATE HATE HATE
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I don't get it.. What happened in March of '97?
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1997 [wikipedia.org]
funding barred for human cloning maybe?
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or of course.. Hale-bopp!
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I think the XKCD forum concluded it was most likely a reference to the Heaven's Gate cult
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heaven's_Gate_(religious_group)
I already know which XKCD you're linking to... (Score:1)
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They're afraid the cats will be smart enough to sense something evil afoot.
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Re:Slashdot isn't upset over Google's changes (Score:5, Insightful)
Infiltrated by Google employees and well-wishers, Slashdot consistently offers justifications for every bad behavior and terrible decision coming from Google.
This will get modded down because trolls have taken over the moderation system and openly subvert it. That's fine. It just proves my point about how Slashdot reacts to anything outside the partyline. This site's news reporting is old, antiquated, and slow...
I was going to mod your trollish, vaguely conspirational, over-the-top comment down indeed, but I will reply instead. You regurgitate all the worn-out memes about the Slashdot community, who is actually anything but of one's mind. Yes, geeks and people who make the effort to think over issues have some stable opinions. This scandalizes you? Tough luck. Yes Google enjoys a favorable opinion here, and why not since their interests and ours coincide in many ways, plus they have shown courage and judgment in their actions (China, SOPA-PIPA). We also happen to know that some well-known PR houses are leading an anti-Google campaign, I understand that the way Steve Ballmer is treated around here may cultivate in him some murderous ideas, which he has actually expressed quite vocally not too long ago, but well, he deserves it.
Google is not above criticism, but you will surely not convince anyone around here that the bogy stories we read from people like you and the language you use can lead to a well thought, well articulated conversation.
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the partyline has been pretty much turning against google lately though, whilst some people think that all anti-google posts are paid, as if they needed to be paid. the reason is pretty simple, not even all google paid employees like what they've been up to lately.
personally I think converging all services into one is the biggest crap with google lately, of course defaulting to showing page previews and all that crap too. I still use their services but that's just the core services. and sure yeah, they fina
Re:Slashdot isn't upset over Google's changes (Score:5, Insightful)
In the case of Google, had some stable opinions. In many ways the USSR brought out the worst in America. Now Facebook is doing the same to Google.
The underlying problem, I think, is that Google's advertising service doesn't have a strong market lock-in. If search shifts to local over night, Google is hosed. Social has more lock-in than search.
Google has done much to admire. I'm still hoping this is just a phase. It's particularly galling to have to put up with all these Google+ changes designed to nobble Facebook, because I never gave a rat's ass about Facebook in the first place. I wish they would pat my cookies down, then denude my pages of all share and plus icons. Now I have two boy prostitutes pawing at me, instead of one. Don't you get it? You're not my thing.
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actually, ALL of you are part of a campaign, deliberate or not, to poison slashdot, which alone is more worth, has created more insight, than google, microsoft, apple, facebook and twitter combined.
this used to be a vestige of cynical people who aren't fucking stupid, now it's endless bickering about some prostitute corporations, as if those didn't have their own PR outlets. cut it out, all of you. anyone who reads any of it, or spends a single mod point on something that is PURE NOISE, is basically a trait
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You regurgitate all the worn-out memes about the Slashdot community
The sad thing is he isn't even trying. I mean, even Natalie Portman covered in tobasco ^H^H^H^H^H^H^H hot grits while (wooshing over Ethanol-fueled) would have the decency to post an obligatory xkcd [xkcd.com].
F-F-F-FIVE MEME COMBO!
Re:There's no other way to criticize Google (Score:5, Informative)
How about this one [computerworld.com].
You are an idiot (Score:1)
And probably a shill for a competitor. I have not seen valid criticism of Google getting down modded. I have only seen shill posts like yours with no substance get modded down to oblivion. The only tech columnists reporting this conspiratorial stuff with no basis in facts are people like MG Siegler or other well known idiots that are paid by Apple or Microsoft.
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So why are you here?
Apparently, the reporting is bad. It's slow. it's biased. It's a hive-mind. Antiquated. Outdated. Hypocritical. A bubble. A linux advocacy masquerading as a news site. The moderation system has been openly subverted by trolls and the site itself infiltrated by Google and Google well-wishers. No commenters come here except to reaffirm their opinions with the rest of the hive.
Yet here you are. I don't understand it.
Comment removed (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Slashdot isn't upset over Google's changes (Score:4, Funny)
No, Grandpa Simpson, it never was. Perhaps you're thinking of Usenet before the Great Renaming?
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I know I bit earlier when this came up, but, can we get some better copy/pasta trolling?
I miss the Golden Girls and on a very strange level, goatse.
Unconscionability (Score:5, Informative)
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Re:Unconscionability (Score:4, Funny)
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He says what everybody else does. (Score:2, Interesting)
If you read every website's privacy, usage, terms of use, and every other linked "agreements" every single one without exception has these vague legalese clauses that basically say what this guy says.
If it were not, you probably would not have a Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn account:
I deleted my LinkedIn account because they will turn into another FB - only they have a more targeted marketing system.
Want to market shit to just programmers? LinkedIN
Accountants? Lawyers? Project Mangers?
LinkedIN.
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they will not enforce them, if it seems like one side tried to hide something in there. but this one is obviously purely honest, so there is nothing hidden, it just IS the worst pp ever. deal with it.
Direct Link (Score:5, Informative)
Here is a direct link to the privacy policy.
http://skipity.com/privacy [skipity.com]
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It's the Privacy Policy equiv of All Your Base Are Belong To Us.
Now if they had a built in game and it was fun, they'd pwn half the web by now.
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You know what? I don't think I'll click that link.
I am shocked (Score:5, Informative)
that no one has yet mentioned that Skipity is just a front for Bing.
Re:I am shocked (Score:5, Insightful)
It's more like a second-rate StumbleUpon.
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To be fair, nobody around here reads the articles, so I appreciate the grandparent post helping out.
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
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viewing the word "Skipity" (Score:2)
"Or as allowed by law" (Score:3)
Most privacy policies are just as bad as the "worst" privacy policy: https://www.google.com/search?sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=privacy+%22or+as+allowed+by+law%22 [google.com]
Note that they give a bunch of circumstances in which they will use your private information, but then they add in "or as *allowed* by law" which means they can do absolutely anything with your information that isn't illegal.
Somehow I think people misread it as "or as required by law" which is an altogether different thing.
"It could be worse" & "... not as bad as" (Score:2)
Note to humanity, if your judgement is a comparison of "what is" and "the worst of all possible situations", you will allow yourself to be harmed up until the time where you ARE in the worst of all known situations... and it will be too late to act.
No, Google is not the worst of all possible situations, but they have acted sufficiently for us all too be concerned about what they do now, what they can do now, and what they are able and willing to do in the future.
in another news... (Score:1, Funny)
Strange behaviour (Score:1)
NEWS for Nerds.. (Score:3)
This isn't news by any stretch of the meaning.. And a viral marketing campaign posted to the front page yesterday about psychics remote sensing aliens? Jesus Slashdot.. NO news is better than turning yourself into a tabloid. Please stop with the posting of non-events and get back to the real reporting
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it's funny.
laugh.
Because the alternative is crying when you realize that other privacy policies are just as bad with out the veneer of satire.
Also, the psychics and aliens thing was supposed to go on Idle. And it was updated to be on idle. Unknown Lamer even posted in the thread about it.
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Regarding the alien psychics thing: Accident acknowledged.
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BBC is that you (Score:1)
Sounds like someone's beta testing... (Score:2)
... this license. Expect it to go into production sometime next year across the web.
I prefer this disclaimer... ;) (Score:5, Funny)
"This product is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. List each check separately by bank number. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Postage will be paid by addressee. Subject to CAB approval. This is not an offer to sell securities. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. Use other side for additional listings. For recreational use only. Do not disturb. All models over 18 years of age. If condition persists, consult your physician. No user-serviceable parts inside. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Subject to change without notice. Times approximate. Simulated picture. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. For off-road use only. As seen on TV. One size fits all. Many suitcases look alike. Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients. Colors may fade. We have sent the forms which seem right for you. Slippery when wet. For office use only. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Drop in any mailbox. Edited for television. Keep cool; process promptly. Post office will not deliver without postage. List was current at time of printing. Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. At participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Penalty for private use. See label for sequence. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Do not write below this line. Falling rock. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. Your canceled check is your receipt. Add toner. Place stamp here. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Be sure each item is properly endorsed. Sign here without admitting guilt. Slightly higher west of the Mississippi. Employees and their families are not eligible. Beware of dog. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery. You must be present to win. No passes accepted for this engagement. No purchase necessary. Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton. Shading within a garment may occur. Use only in a well-ventilated area. Keep away from fire or flames. Replace with same type. Approved for veterans. Booths for two or more. Check here if tax deductible. Some equipment shown is optional. Price does not include taxes. No Canadian coins. Not recommended for children. Prerecorded for this time zone. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No solicitors. No alcohol, dogs or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. Restaurant package, not for resale. List at least two alternate dates. First pull up, then pull down. Call toll free number before digging. Driver does not carry cash. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Record additional transactions on back of previous stub. Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T. Do not fold, spindle or mutilate. No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop. Package sold by weight, not volume. Your mileage may vary. Known as Hellman's east of the Rockies. Beware of greeks bearing gifts. Beware of gifts bearing greeks. This side up. Don't take any wooden nickels. Don't take candy from strangers. Void where prohibited. Caveat Emptor (Buyer beware) Caveat Vendor (Beware of street people). Donde esta el bano. Beware of DOS. Look both ways before crossing the street. All your base are belong to us. Always wear safety belt. Always wear deodorant. Don't forget to breathe. If you park, don't drink...accidents cause people. This supersedes all previous notices.
This modified disclaimer may not be copied without the expressed written consent of whoever I stole it from."
implant a chip in your body? even a job can't do (Score:2)
implant a chip in your body?
even for a job they can't make you do that I don't thing this will hold up in any court.
Skipity is just ahead of their time (Score:3, Insightful)
You mean- "The Web's BEST Privacy Policy"!!! (Score:2)
Helpful? (Score:3)
Helpful in what way? In an "sure, our president (for example) is doing something very bad, but it's helpful to remember a worse leader in history: Hitler" sort of way?
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Bottom Line It, Anyone? (Score:2)
What is the bottom line on Google's new consolidated privacy policy? What was private before that is now not private?
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The bottom line is that you are using Google's services FREE OF CHARGE and if you don't like their new privacy policy then you are free to use some other service, free or paid, of your own choice. And if you believe the outrage will be/is so tremendous, feel free to start your own competing services with a 'better' policy.
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Thanks for being the man's bitch, giving me his static and telling me nothing