Police Want Fast Track To Get At Your Private Data

An anonymous reader writes "According to this story on CNET, police again are pushing for new laws requiring ISPs and webmail providers to store users' private data for five years and also want a new electronic way of speeding up subpoenas and search warrants via police-only encrypted portals at all ISPs and webmail providers."

No problem

[elrous0]

As long as the guy with the files is using Internet Explorer, they can have all the access they want [slashdot.org].

Kevin Mitnick needed

[e2d2]

Where is Kevin Mitnick when you need him?

Yo dawg we heard you like wire taps so we put a wire tap in your wire tap so we can hear while you hear.

A million internets to the first person to crack this system.

Re:Just So Everyone Is Clear

[FooAtWFU]

I agree. In the name of liberty, we should continue to limit the processing of these requests to post-it notes.

Re:Bore them to death

[eldavojohn]

Hey, they can look at my data. It will bore them to death.

They'll find my four trillion digits of pi boring until they realize that every trillionth digit is the start of a datetime stamp followed by geographic coordinates indicating when and where I'm going to kill next. How many people have to die before they realize that it's GMT with no adjustments for daylight savings!?

Sincerely,

- Pi Killer

Re:Okay, but on one condition

[Terrasque]

oooh, good idea. I vote for using SSD's to store the data, so we can access it quickly if the need ever arise.

Re:Because they can?!

[_merlin]

That sounds like the kind of thing an enemy of Freedom(TM) would say. I think we need to fast-track the retrieval of headkase's personal information, so we can find something that could be construed as evidence of support for terrorism and put him away before he robs us of our lifesytle.

You see, it's the Freedom(TM) to agree with whoever is currently top dog - not freedom to make your own decisions. (Kind of like RMS GNU/Freedom, really.)

Re:Bore them to death

[Maxo-Texas]

e! That's irrational!

Re:Bore them to death

[TheWizardTim]

I can't wait to meet the new boss, as long as we don't get fooled again.

Re:Bore them to death

[gestalt_n_pepper]

Heil Palin.

Re:Bore them to death

[Grishnakh]

Fool me once, shame on -- shame on you. Fool me -- You can't get fooled again.

Re:No problem

[LifesABeach]

If one is a Bad Guy, and I'm not saying I am, then the best Law Enforcement are those that investigate from their chairs. Care for another Donut?

Re:Bore them to death

[Snarf You]

I can't wait to meet the new boss, as long as we don't get fooled again.

There's an old saying in Tennessee, I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee that says, "fool me once ... shame on ... shame on you... if-- fool me, but can't get fooled again."

(oblig. link) [youtube.com]

Could they do that...

[JackPepper]

for snail mail as well. You never know when you'll need that year old coupon.

Re:Bore them to death

[TheWizardTim]

Only when playing pinball.

Re:Bore them to death

[camperdave]

Unless his split-personality counterpart is an old world evil mathematician, counting the digits of pi in long scale trillions, while the psychotic killer split-personality counterpart uses short scale trillions.