USPTO Issues Provisional Storyline Patent 453
cheesedog writes "The USPTO will issue the first storyline patent in history today, with two others following in the next few months. Right to Create points out that this was anticipated several months ago in a story by Richard Stallman published in the The Guardian, UK. With the publication of this not-yet-granted patent, its author can begin requiring licensing fees for anyone whose activities might fall within its claims, including book authors, movie studies, television studios and broadcasters, etc. The claims appear to cover the literary elements of a story involving an ambitious high school student who applies for entrance to MIT and prays to remain sleeping until the acceptance letter comes, which doesn't happen for another 30 years."
You aint seen nothing yet (Score:3, Interesting)
This is so fucking depressing. Do Australians have to honour this patent within Australia? Did the government fuck us over with a treaty that makes it so any of our work falls under this god-forsaken piece of shit?
Impressive Prior Art Though... (Score:3, Interesting)
According to Joseph Campbell, nearly all good stories conform to a standard cycle (the name of which eludes me right now), making all heroic-type stories unpatentable.
Shame about originality though. And also a shame that if someone comes to sue you, you've got to go through a long process to prove that you weren't copying their stuff. The one with the biggest legal bill will probably win.
What was wrong with copyright anyway? All works of fiction are under copyright, and there are existing ways to deal with transgressions. Plagiarism is anethema to real authors, as well.
Palm Sunday. (Score:5, Interesting)
Whoever patents the five or six storylines that are the basis for virtually all books will become richer then Bill Gates.
The neat thing about this is that you don't have to actuall write the books yourself. The patent office punishes the people who get off their ass and do things while rewarding people who get in the patent line early and patent things they have never built or made.
Re:Reductio ad Absurdum (Score:2, Interesting)
Good On 'Em!
Yeah, that's right, I'm cheering.
The law appears to allow it. The law is probably broken. Will anything be done about how broken the law is unless people realise it's broken? 'Course not, it never is... unless it's something that threatens your or my "national interests", but that's straying into "-1 Offtopic" and "-1 Flamebait" territory.
So, if things are broken, and they won't get fixed until someone is caught taking advantage of the situation, then let them try to take advantage of the situation and let the public know!
Re:Impressive Prior Art Though... (Score:2, Interesting)
Re:Palm Sunday. (Score:2, Interesting)
Re:Publish, not issue (Score:2, Interesting)
max born, no one has been able to come up with an example of prior art for the Amazon one-click patent. Honestly, if that's not a case of a decent software patent, what is?
Re:USPTO Broken (Score:4, Interesting)
I'm going to go back to Jonathan Swift here, in Gulliver's Travels. He claimed that the Yahoos, who were these little dirty, simian versions of humans with no intellect and nothing but greed, hatred, disease and guile, had lawyers. One yahoo found a shiny rock. Another yahoo came and tried to take it away from him. Struggle insues. 3rd yahoo comes in and takes it away from both of them (that's the lawyer).
Swift would've positively loved this one.
But anyway, I have to get in a cursory rant about what an apocalyptic crime this is. Feel free to ignore it, i'm sure it'll just be repeated several thousand times over. Now, it's not the fact that a patent may or may not be valid (i.e., conforming to the rules of a sadistic, flawed game), it's the fact that still more needless litigation is being introduced into a system that is already frought with friction. That friction favors the powers that be and makes sure that nothing truly creative ever happens again in the United States. If this shit is allowed to continue, you will never see another dirt-poor writer making it to fame, or another hacker in a basement cooking up the next revolution in technology.
Re:Publish, not issue (Score:5, Interesting)
And, sadly, it looks like this guy is serious. Looks like he's even set up a practice [plotpatents.com] to promote helping others get storyline patents.
Re:USPTO Broken (Score:3, Interesting)
Okay then...lets all vote CowboyNeal for president. >_>
Re:Marines (Score:3, Interesting)
Second, yes this moron is a lawyer, but he's a patent lawyer, which means he has a technical degree. He got it from MIT (and yes, I still think he's a moron). I'm in law school, and I am quite comfortable in vi. I use vi to write my case briefs in LaTeX. If he doesn't know how to use vi himself, he ought to be smart enough to hire someone who does. There's no reason to have a bad webpage.
Re:USPTO Broken (Score:2, Interesting)
Re:You aint seen nothing yet (Score:5, Interesting)
It's a test case. If approved, there will be literally thousands of similar ones approved and used to harrass writers all over the world.
I found this on the asshole who is making the claim's website [plotpatents.com]:
So the same concept as submarine patents: don't create a sellable product, just patent the concept and wait to ambush someone who has the talent to think of it AND bring it to market. The main target will be movie studios I think -- already they have to fight off hacks who claim that someone read their script and stole the idea, now they'd be liable even if the "idea" was never shown to anyone or published.
Parody? (Score:4, Interesting)
Re:USPTO Broken (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:Palm Sunday. (Score:3, Interesting)
But Is He Serious? (Score:5, Interesting)
The site is so absurb that it almost does count as some kind of anti-patent comic sketch.