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The Internet United Kingdom Your Rights Online

UK Plans To Censor Online Videos Of 'Non-Conventional' Sex Acts (betanews.com) 135

Mark Wilson, writing for BetaNews: The UK government's relationship with the web is something of a checkered one. Keen to pander to the fear of concerned hand-wringers, we've seen torrent sites blocked and there are plans afoot to censor porn sites that do not implement 'effective' age checks. Now there is a chance that UK web users will be denied access to websites that portray "non-conventional sexual acts" in the latest act of censorship by the government. A bill currently being considered would apply the same restrictions to online pornography that currently apply offline. In what appears to be yet another example of the government failing to understand quite how the internet works -- and trying to bend offline laws to apply to online situations -- the plan is to block websites that display content that would not normally receive a classification if released on DVD.
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UK Plans To Censor Online Videos Of 'Non-Conventional' Sex Acts

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  • Fist post (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday November 23, 2016 @04:04PM (#53349327)

    Fist post

  • to their will doesn't make it so. I'm really getting tired of liberals being dismissive of the power and organizational skills that regressives (I refuse to call them "Conservative", they're not. Spade a Spade).

    Shit like this is how we got Brexit & Trump. Just keep looking down on them and don't make any attempt to understand why they do what they do. They'll continue to route around you and take over via the tyranny of the minority.
    • Exactly. It is very foolish to say the "government doesn't know the Internet". They know. They aren't stupid. And yes, you can censor the Internet and also stop piracy which is another thing that Slashbots claim you "can't do". It just depends on how much effort they want to put into it.
      • Look how much effort China puts into censoring the internet. Are they willing to go to those lengths? And 'subversive' information still gets through pretty easily, for anyone that wants it enough.

        That said, basic restrictions can discourage casual browsers, average people that aren't invested enough to try to circumvent the blocks. Then again, that's almost never the group that caused the problem they're trying to fix.

      • by arth1 ( 260657 )

        Exactly. It is very foolish to say the "government doesn't know the Internet". They know. They aren't stupid.

        The government (any government) consists of a mix of people, some of who are reasonably smart, and some who really are quite stupid. Sometimes the stupid ones have enough clout to screw it up for those in the government who understand things better. While a country might be a democracy, the governments themselves seldom are.

        The House of Lords is a good example. Many of the people there aren't there because of merits. And the House of Commons - well, who gets appointed to which committee isn't all about

        • The people who propose this type of leglisation arent the House of Lords. They are the people working for them. They "know the Internet" just fine.
      • by rtb61 ( 674572 )

        Stop the lies, we all know it has nothing to with with 'copying or downloading' content, nor pornography nor the children, all 100% about political censorship and putting corporate propaganda back on central stage and independent media silenced or in prison. You can bet, whoops censored you by accident at election time will be the norm and just to fuck with everyone further, absolutely no court required to censor but going to court is required to clear that censorship and you can guaranteed when it comes t

    • by Anonymous Coward

      While I agree with you and government trying to control, this has nothing to do with Trump or Brexit. Liberals are breaking new records in fascism these days, both sides are nothing but a comedy show.
      Trump was the only choice to eliminate Hillary ( who much like Trump is hated by millions) and many British don't want to bow down to foreign control. People have different reasons and you can't be so American about picking a team and blindly agreeing with everything they do.

    • by AHuxley ( 892839 )
      But think of the contractors, the hardware, software the the over time and the upgrades. The enforcement and catching of people who try the wrong site, ip.
      The NGO's, SJW, foundations, cults, faiths and public private partnerships that get to alter an entire nations web usage and then add their own ideas or faith to banned sites.
      Once this system is in place wait for an ever expanding list of topics. News, faith, politics, history, blasphemy will all slowly get added with ever more funding for upkeep and
    • Actually, I think they're a Spode [wikipedia.org], not a Spade.

    • It can't be conservatives politicians that are against deviant sex practices. It's usually conservatives politicians that are found dead with plastic bags over their head trying to get off.

      • That is a blatant lie. By the time the conservative politicians are found MI5 has removed the plastic bag (and the orange) and packed the body into an intesting pose inside a zip-up bag.

  • by NoNonAlphaCharsHere ( 2201864 ) on Wednesday November 23, 2016 @04:06PM (#53349351)
    A young girl marries an older Greek sailor. On her wedding day, her mother warns her, "These Greek sailors can be pretty strange, if he suggests anything out-of-the-ordinary in the bedroom, you tell him No Way!". Sure enough, after about a month of marriage, one night, he suggests something different, and like a good girl, she shuts him down. He says "But darling, don't you want to have children?".
    • +1 Ethnic humor

      Whaddya got for Scottish people? I'm having Thanksgiving with some tomorrow.

      • by Anonymous Coward

        After announcing he was getting married, a boy tells his pal he will be wearing the kilt.

        "And what's the tartan?" asks his mate.

        "Oh, she'll be wearing a white dress," he replies

      • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

        by Anonymous Coward

        An Englishman, Irishman, and Scotsman are sitting next to each other at a bar. Then, by an amazing coincidence, three flies land in their drinks, one each.

        The Englishman discretely spoons the fly out of his drink.
        The Irishman flicks the fly from his drink directly at the Englishman.
        The Scotsman grabs the fly from his drink and says "all right you wee bastard, spit it out! Now!"

        • I'm afraid my Scottish friends won't understand the jokes unless there are a lot more curse words.

      • Let's call this the unofficial Thanksgiving 2016 ethnic humor thread. Be warned, if your joke is not funny or is only funny to neo-Nazis, you will have 12 months of bad luck. Hell, you're going to have 12 months of bad luck anyway.

        • Hell, you're going to have 12 months of bad luck anyway.

          Only 12 months? Two Jews walk into a bar. Pay up.

      • You have Scottish for Thanksgiving? Most people just have a Turkey.

    • How would I know whether I have ever engaged in a 'non-conventional' act?

      Exactly what is a non-conventional act? Would something that is conventional today have been un-conventional 100 years ago?

      Maybe we should also ban eating unconventional foods?

      What is the state's interest in doing this? Are people watching these videos out in the streets, or on the subway or something?
      • It's hard to imagine something for which there is no precedent going back 100s of years, unless we're talking sex with cloned sheep, sex with GMO crops or sex with iphones. Maybe that's why apple keep trying to remove the connectors.
      • How would I know whether I have ever engaged in a 'non-conventional' act?

        They'd tell you, after you'd been arrested.

        What is the state's interest in doing this? Are people watching these videos out in the streets, or on the subway or something?

        They have to be seen to be doing something useful, otherwise people start to wonder why these wonks are getting paid so much to sit around watching us watch porn. A vaguely described quality like "non-conventional" allows them to define pretty much anything as "non-conventional", so it becomes a handy excuse to pinch anyone they want to. You can guarantee that nobody from the upper classes is going to be charged for watching spanking videos (despite this being t

        • by Maritz ( 1829006 )
          I imagine the real reason is to have a convenient pretext for supression. Info-gathering, blackmail, extortion. A "list" to check every time a political opponent gets too much traction.
      • Looking at your Slashdot login it is fair to say you have I think.
      • The British police are a lizard like species. They hate our filthy 'human' ways.

    • No, no, what they are worried about is this sort of thing: https://www.theguardian.com/bo... [theguardian.com]

      I think you'll agree that it sounds pretty out there.

  • Also if you voted brexit, you gave these clowns a ton more power. Way to go.

    • by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday November 23, 2016 @06:08PM (#53350271)

      Also if you voted brexit, you gave these clowns a ton more power. Way to go.

      Surely 'hard brexit' will be classified as a 'Non-Conventional' sex act due to the number of us getting screwed a the same time.

    • by mjwx ( 966435 )

      Also if you voted brexit, you gave these clowns a ton more power. Way to go.

      To be fair, given their success with blocking bit torrent, I'd say people who want to see unconventional porn have nothing to worry about even if this does pass parliament.

  • by MAXOMENOS ( 9802 ) <mikeNO@SPAMmikesmithfororegon.com> on Wednesday November 23, 2016 @04:12PM (#53349413) Homepage
    That is to say, would "non-conventional sex acts" include intercourse with a pig, as allegedly committed by the former and disgraced Prime Minister?
    • That is to say, would "non-conventional sex acts" include intercourse with a pig, as allegedly committed by the former and disgraced Prime Minister?

      For what it's worth, the pig was hot as hell.

    • That is to say, would "non-conventional sex acts" include intercourse with a pig, as allegedly committed by the former and disgraced Prime Minister?

      Perhaps the conventionality will be decided statistically. This will provide jobs for statisticians, pig farmers and comedians.

      "All you get from a public school, right -- one, you get a top job, right, and two, you get an interest in perverse sexual practices. I mean, that's why British management's so inefficient. As soon as they get in the boardroom, they're all shutting each others' dicks in the door! "Go on, give it another slam, Sir Michael!" BAM! OW OW OW! "Come on, Sir Geoffrey, let's play the Pan

  • by Anonymous Coward

    I love the UK, but I think the people of Britain seriously need to reign-in their government. Between the Orwellian surveillance laws and increasingly anachronistic censorship laws ... it's no wonder the public was thinking "government accountability" during the Brexit referendum. They are probably getting tired of this shit and don't want government with longer leash. Kind to think of it, we've been getting a wee bit cross with government over-reach on this side of the pond too.

  • Whu (Score:2, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward

    Why is this a bad thing? It would be better if they banned porn entirely just like the alliance of feminists and religious organizations from Christians to Muslims want it.
    It objectifies women which is bad, it feeds into rape culture which is bad, it is immoral and unethical for the aforementioned reasons and since it is immoral and unethical then that means it is bad even by religious standards.
    Well, the opinions of conservatives is irrelevant, the most important opinion is the feminist one even if it's th

    • It objectifies women which is bad,

      I think you'll find the ban will apply to quite a lot of porn that doesn't include any women at all.

    • Yep when the say 'unconventional' what they mean is gay.. This bill is form the voice of the UK Taliban, whether feminazis or con-servatives or Christian police fundamentalists its all the same. They hate sex, they hate sex that isn't in the missionary position between married couples. They want sex tucked back into the dirty Victorian cupboard so they can get on and start having rape sex with the child prostitutes like they did back in Victorian London. They also like-need it illegal because that's another

  • Since many right-wing sectors claim that what gays do is "unnatural", does this mean that gay porn will be banned as well?

    • I don't know if it's true and still the case, but about 10 years ago a British colleague told me that gay porn videos couldn't legally be produced in the UK. The legal argument was that gay sex was only tolerated in the privacy of your own home, and that a camera counted as a third set of eyes in the room... therefore making it an illegal lewd act in public.

    • Do the people who want to censor 'unconventional' acts have any idea what gay people actually do? Are there are any gay people here who could enlighten us?

      If they don't like the videos, why don't they just not watch them. Self censor.
  • I liked that scene with Stephen Fry. Coming soon to real life I guess.

    • by AHuxley ( 892839 )
      How long will the VPN's hold on a UK CC? A VPN out of the EU? What nations will fold to UK banking enforcement and political pressure to hand over all UK CC VPN details?
      That will be the real movie moment when the VPN fail, payments discovered and just having VPN seen as a circumvention method.
      A VPN account will be enough for a search?
      If not everyone interesting will just buy a non EU/UK VPN account and use the net or find a free way to get around the ever expanding gov ip and url blocks.
      • How will they know what you're spending money on?

        Do you understand the amount of work it would be to trace and catalog EVERY company on the internet that offers VPN services? What about third party resellers? What about companies who's primary products are not VPN services? Are all of their customers suddenly lumped into the same pile as the VPS users?

        Seriously, its a really complex mess that would be difficult to track. Using a Credit Card is fine, and if you would like to be a little more cautious, choose

        • by AHuxley ( 892839 )
          How many big VPN brands exist with great reviews on trusted sites? 50? 100?
          Thats not a lot of brands to add to vast gov mandated reporting databases.
          Thats not a lot to search for given most nations now really enjoy tracking banking.
          Most govs can request details on transitions they are watching long term. Adding 100 extra payments to brand of interest to the gov is not that hard.
          Even nations with very limited funds like Australia can track all transactions of interest going back to the 1980's with effo
          • Tracking is going to be even more prevalent in the next couple of years, as the new directives on AML and on payment services are reducing the minimum threshold for due diligence. The new threshold is low enough to pretty much require DD/KYC of all customers.

      • Search? You think someone able and willing to set up a VPN won't know how to hide his stuff so you can do a cavity search and still won't find anything?

        Blocks and censorship is a damage to the net, and they are treated accordingly.

  • by sootman ( 158191 )

    I'll give $10 to the first site that posts a video of a gangbang at a convention. That would be some "conventional" sex, right?

    • Save your money and go to a furry convention, they might pay you to tape it and you'll probably get very ... alternative sex acts to tape, too.

  • Where stuffy British politicians argue over what is 'non-conventional' without blushing.
  • by Opportunist ( 166417 ) on Thursday November 24, 2016 @02:31AM (#53352775)

    Seriously. What exactly is the problem? We're not talking about videos where a party is forced to participate, that's a different matter, we're talking about acts where everyone involved is happy to participate and get recorded. So what exactly is your problem with it? That you consider it "unnatural"? That it makes you sick to the stomach? Here's a novel idea that should solve your problems:

    Don't watch the video.

    It makes me sick to the stomach to think that such backwards idiots are breeding, but that doesn't mean I start demanding that you stop pumping out units every nine months. Maybe I should. That, unlike your demand, would indeed make the world a better place.

    How exactly does that video affect you in any way whatsoever?

    • You need to understand that pornographic producers work in a market, and a very competitive one.

      And in this market, since competition scarcely rely on talent and imagination, a not negligible part of it relies on being trashier than the competitor.

      You might remember the "golden age of porn" being much more about a man and a woman having sex (or two men if they were so inclined, or two women) than about gang-bang bukkakke (or other acts that are not made because the potential viewer is attracted to t
      • But the market standard, by the very laws of supply and demand, was, is, and will always be man/men doing stuff with woman/women. Because that's simply what most people are into. Just because it's possible or allowed, people won't suddenly go "hey, I always wanted to see fat guys with beards in sailor moon outfits and diapers fist each other with turnips". That's not gonna happen. It's not going to become something people really want to see.

        Ok. SOME people would probably want to see that. But this is hardly

  • Isn't defining what acceptable intercourse is the business of the church?

    What of separation of state and church?

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