What The DHS Is Looking For In Your Posts 278
New submitter lister king of smeg writes "As we all know The Department of Homeland Security monitors social networks,in an attempt to expose 'Items Of Interest.' As it turns out many terms including seemingly benign words such as flu, agent, response, cops drill, etc are on the list of words that set off warning bells for the government spooks. Many of the terms make sense ..., but there are some real stupid ones on the list to like 'social network' ... [according to a] list of key words provided to a DHS contractor that were released by EPIC."
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:5, Funny)
... Tornado, Twister, Tsunami, ...
Are they trying to catch real-world terrorists or Lex Luthor?
They're looking for the coed naked twister parties. I haven't seen a t-shirt or hat with that phrase in probably 20 years...
Seriously though I hope they whitelist weather.gov or else a lot of mostly harmless meteorologists will pay the ultimate price in america's war on civil liberties err I mean terror.
Re:Examples (Score:4, Funny)
Is it too late to start calling them the DeHStapo?
Kiddie porn (Score:5, Funny)
RADIOACTIVE AGRO TERROR!!!!!!!!!twelve131313
Better yet, I had to get my kids inoculated with TAMIFLU and now can't afford to contribute to this year's IRA. I went to the TARGET last night in SAN DIEGO and had a conversation with a SMART cashier. She told me that she was an AGRICULTURE major before moving from EL PASO but decided that GAS was too expensive for that.
WOOT! [epic.org]
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:4, Funny)
Hurricane, Tornado, Twister, Tsunami, Earthquake, Tremor, Flood
Are they trying to catch real-world terrorists or Lex Luthor?
They're looking for music pirates! Its a RIAA front! Beware!
Rock you like a Huricaaaaane... (a little over played, but good)
Pantera_Floods.mp3 (pretty good)
"Texas Tornado" by Bobby Braddock (note I spec'd music pirates, not "good music" pirates)
Earthquake by lil wayne (see above note x10)
I need some help w/ the rest...
Re:Slashdotters are safe for now (Score:5, Funny)
DDOS (Dedicated Denial of Service)
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:3, Funny)
Obligatory: http://xkcd.com/723/ [xkcd.com]
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:2, Funny)
Well, Homeland security also encompasses the Federal Emergency Management Agency, so they do have some real interest in getting the news fast if there is a natural disaster going on.
In that case, they should also watch for "aliens", "alien-human hybrids", "black oil", and "colonization".
Re:Free GPS receiver! (Score:5, Funny)
It's 72 virgins you insensitive clod!
- Akmad
Not after I'm done with them.
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:5, Funny)
I think we should find out all the words that they're monitoring, and organize a movement to have everyone slip them all into their facebook/twitter posts.
Hey everyone! I just dropped a dirty bomb in the toilet. So stinky!
or
I'm going to really attack the gym today, do some exercise drills. It'll be an explosion of activity!
or
Molly, I really loved seeing you tonight. Happy Birthday! Chemical weapons.
Re:since 9/11 (Score:5, Funny)
hillbilly hand fishin.
That's... that's not a real show, is it?
-googles-
Mother of God... it is.
Re:Free GPS receiver! (Score:4, Funny)
Nope... but you can go get me a sandwich.
sudo !!
I am surprised no one posted this yet (Score:4, Funny)
Let's Have Fun (Score:4, Funny)
Seriously... the best way to confound such a keyword system is to make analysis meaningless.
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:5, Funny)
but we are in the US, so we have square feet instead of square meters... which means it takes 9 times as many sensors!
Re:Attention DHS! (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:5, Funny)
but we are in the US, so we have square feet
ah, that explains the high cost of shoes, here, then!
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:5, Funny)
Great, now you've got Lex Luthor with a utility belt and an invisible plane.
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:5, Funny)
Aw, geez, not this shit again. Clark Kent is a reporter. He wears glasses. Superman is... Superman. He's weird and cool. And he does not. Wear. GLASSES!
Give it up already.
Re:Great, now the terrorists are controlling natur (Score:4, Funny)
And a hot bustier! Tim Curry will be jealous.