Microsoft Seeks Patent On 'Quieting Mobile Devices' 71
theodp writes "GeekWire reports on a pending Microsoft patent that proposes to give parents a centralized dashboard on their phones for remotely monitoring and setting restrictions on other family members' mobile devices. The newly-published patent application for Automatically Quieting Mobile Devices explains how parents could use the dashboard to shut down family members' devices during certain time periods, at designated locations, during specified events, and in designated quiet zones. From the patent: 'Aspects that might be disabled include any type of interactive functions and/or features of a device (except, in some examples, initiating emergency telephone calls or emergency text messages and displaying the current time/date or information related to the quiet time may still be permitted), playing games, communicating (via phone, VOIP applications, text messaging, instant messaging, and/or email), using other applications (e.g., browsers, messaging applications, social networking applications, or consuming certain content (e.g., digital media content).' Microsoft also proposes equipping parents' phones with 'biometric detection' to thwart kids who try to circumvent 'Big Mother'."
Patents are beyond absurd... (Score:4, Interesting)
...and this isn't an anti-Microsoft rant as all public companies and most private ones are guilty of this as well.
Step 1: Take common ingredients used in hundreds if not thousands of other applications and/or software
Step 2: Mix them together in a way that is any more innovative than any new software package is by the mere fact of being new
Step 3: Patent it
WTF?
Why can't restaurants patent mixing ingredients together then? It's the same crap, lol...
Chef - "Oh, I added a cherry on top of the Bananas Foster - surely that's patent worthy, right?"
Patent Lawyer - "Oh, HELL YES, and I'm not just saying that because my entire livelihood and those of my useless brethren is riding on the answer... Go meshugah..."
Re:Patents are beyond absurd... (Score:4, Interesting)
They're only "seeking" this patent. Sure, it might be granted eventually but that's when the complaints should start.
The problem is with corporations treating patenting of basic features as a primary buisness goal. There's basically an ongoing patent war amongst all the companies of a certain size. Basically you need to acquire a certain amount of patents, keep acquiring more, then deal with your competitors to exchange patents in exchange for no lawsuits while ganging up on smaller companies attempting to enter the space. Ultimately the validity of patents is of little use in the war because the goal is to make it too expensive to litigate rather than to innovate.
Also, everyone should learn to read patents and patent applications. These are very often misinterpreted. I'm sure there's nothing whatsoever here that is patenting "quieting mobile devices" but is instead patenting a specific way of doing this. The boilerplate of supporting claims are not the main claims of patents.