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EFF Wants To Know If the Feds Are Cyberstalking

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  • Uh oh (Score:2, Funny)

    by MillionthMonkey (240664) on Wednesday December 02, 2009 @08:05PM (#30305542)
    I just poked Osama Bin Laden on his wall.
  • Mafia wars (Score:5, Funny)

    by tnk1 (899206) on Wednesday December 02, 2009 @08:15PM (#30305640)

    "The US Attorney for the Southern District of New York has announced a RICO case has been filed against all players of the game Mafia Wars. It is clear that these are hardened criminals who not only kill without remorse, but share their results on social networking sites. The US Attorney's Office thanks the social networking site Facebook for their cooperation in bringing these mobsters to justice."

  • Peekaboo! (Score:1, Funny)

    by Montezumaa (1674080) on Wednesday December 02, 2009 @08:15PM (#30305642)
  • by geekmux (1040042) on Wednesday December 02, 2009 @08:55PM (#30306052)

    ....my wife woke up and found weird crop circles in Farmville. She swears she didn't plant them that way.

  • Why not? (Score:1, Funny)

    by SilverHatHacker (1381259) on Wednesday December 02, 2009 @10:03PM (#30306568)
    Doesn't everyone stalk other people on Facebook? Come on, let me see a show of hands...
    Come on, don't be shy...
    *crickets*
  • by Frosty Piss (770223) on Wednesday December 02, 2009 @10:48PM (#30306870)
    All of my tentical porn involves females over 18. I guess they could Photoshop me into some of those "sticky" situations...
  • by AHuxley (892839) on Wednesday December 02, 2009 @11:09PM (#30307010) Homepage Journal
    DoD, DIA ect are the areas of the US gov that actually *work*.
    They stand on buildings around anti war protesters and film everything they can zoom in on.
    They record all car plates in the area too.
    If your too bright, articulate, photogenic or charming, they can always stick a cute 20 something on you with more 'direct ideas'.
    Your group will then waste years doing useless busy work or be on domestic terrorism charges.
    They then just drift back into the protest movements.
    Every so often you get a peek of low level police work.
    http://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2007/08/23/police-montebello.html [www.cbc.ca]
    ... "one reason protesters knew the men's true identities was because they were wearing the same boots as other police officers."
  • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday December 03, 2009 @01:29AM (#30307740)

    There's something very satisfying about looking up a girl who was totally hot and completely ignored you in high school, to see that she's divorced and fat.

  • Get a grip (Score:4, Funny)

    by daveime (1253762) on Thursday December 03, 2009 @02:08AM (#30307900)

    Look, the guy is holed up in a cave with a couple of goats in the middle of Nowhere, Pakistan (And still the US can't find him, but that's another lol). He has to send a runner with a cassette tape 500km to the Al Jazeera office every time he has a new fatwa to issue.

    It's not like he's going to be updating his Facebook status very often.

    Osama has updated his profile : Today I feel like crushing infidels.
    Fahid commented on Osama's post : lol habibi.
    Ahmed likes this.
    Mohammad pokes Osama.
    Osama has been busy in the kitchen and has cooked too many Kung Pao Chicken. Help him out on Cafe World.
    Osama has been downgraded to level 1 in Habbo Hotel, because he keeps blowing up his buildings (sorry, it slipped out).

    As for the rest of the world, the signal to noise ratio is just too great for the Feebs to glean anything useful. Christ, I only have family and a few close friends on my FB, but the amount of drivel they post is unreal.

    I'm on the bus going to town.
    I'm at town.
    I saw blah blah in town.
    Where ?
    At the coffee shop.
    I nearly said hello, but thought I'd tweet you instead.
    and so on, and so on ...

  • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday December 03, 2009 @03:16AM (#30308146)

    Chances are, no one in government cares about you, or your drunken antics posted on facespace. If they did, well, you put it out in public, so quit complaining when they read it.

    Hard to say. Maybe you've got a friend, one of whose friends had connections (e.g. worked closely) with a terrorist. You might not know that. I do know that, which is why I'm posting as A.C.

    Of course, half the stuff on my facebook page is bogus, anyhow. The people who have reason to know, know which half, mostly.

  • by Paradigma11 (645246) <Paradigma11@hotmail.com> on Thursday December 03, 2009 @07:01AM (#30308920)

    True. Now we have the question about "friends."

    I submit a request to be your Facebook friend as "CuteBlonde362436" and you accept, thinking that I might be a cute blonde with measurements 36-24-36. At this point, I have access to your information including the fact that you like to molest small woodland creatures. Of course, I'm neither cute, blonde, nor do I have those measurements. However, I am part of an FBI task force charged with protecting small woodland creatures from molestation and the reason I approached you on Facebook is due to an anonymous tip that said you were into that sort of thing.

    I now have all the evidence I need to have you locked up for a very long time.

    Entrapment?

    Why would he want a cute blond when he is into small woodland creatures :)

  • Worse (Score:1, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Thursday December 03, 2009 @11:34AM (#30310660)

    What would be worse is if they could some how associate your 4chan posts with you, despite their being artistic works of fiction and falsehood.

"Most of us, when all is said and done, like what we like and make up reasons for it afterwards." -- Soren F. Petersen

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