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Microsoft Moves To Quash Case, End E-mail Revelations 158

CWmike writes "Microsoft asked a federal judge yesterday to end the class-action lawsuit that has been the source of a treasure trove of embarrassing insider e-mails covering everything from managers badmouthing Intel to others on who worried how Vista would be compared to Apple's Mac OS X in 2005. In seeking to end the case, Microsoft argues the plaintiffs have not demonstrated that the lowest-priced version of Windows Vista was not the 'real' Vista, or showed that users paid more for PCs prior to the new operating system's launch because of the Vista Capable campaign."
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Microsoft Moves To Quash Case, End E-mail Revelations

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  • Microsoft today issued a plea through its network of objective opinion-shapers: Don't let the journalists near it. [today.com]

    "We understand that many journalists use Macs," said CNet marketing marketer Don Reisinger. "This means they necessarily suckle at the Satanic rear passage of Steve Jobs. We cannot countenance their bias. Journalists are responsible for all those signs outside computer shops offering to replace Vista with XP. When was the last time you saw the entire technology field stop and wait for an announcement from any other company besides Apple? It's so unfair!"

    Smears and slanders also come from obsessive overweight nerdy Mac-using Linux geek troublemakers who run "benchmarks" and "tests." "It's horrifying bias from the 'reality'-based community," said ZDNet marketing marketer Mary Jo Enderle. "We understand that, just because Vista was 40% slower than XP, the nattering nabobs of negativism are already writing that it's 'not enough of an improvement.' It's so unfair!"

    "Mactards are like concentration camp guards," said Guardian marketing marketer Jack Schofield, "brutalising 'I'm A PC' users and" [This comment has been removed by a Guardian moderator. Replies may also be deleted.]

    "The only reason Vista failed was because Microsoft planned for it to fail," said Reisinger in an earlier ad-banner troll post. "It was a fantastically subtle double-bluff! They did the honorable thing in the face of the vile calumnies spread by Apple. It's so unfair!"

  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday November 22, 2008 @05:52PM (#25860173)

    actually.

    power corrupts, but powrpoint corrupts absolutly...

  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday November 22, 2008 @06:02PM (#25860233)

    Fact: Microsoft has VERY strict Conduct Guidelines that every employee and manager must comply with. These guidelines do include proper Business Conduct, and cover things such as accepting or handing out bribes (in any form, including "well it was just a nice gesture!" scenarios). They're referred to as "SBC" (Standards of Business Conduct).

    These mandatory compliance rules are updated on average twice a year (sometimes more often depending upon what changes), and every employee has to watch a series of videos, take a quiz, and agree to comply with said guidelines else risk immediate termination. Failure to comply with these rules will result in termination and/or legal repercussions, depending upon what the offence was.

    These rules have been getting more and more strict as time goes on, probably because of cases like this. Sadly, such guidelines wouldn't be necessary if employees (regardless of their stature/role) acted responsibly and weren't sneaky/shady bastards.

  • by spazdor ( 902907 ) on Saturday November 22, 2008 @06:53PM (#25860529)

    Is Microsoft going to defend itself by insinuating that little old ladies should have informed themselves by reading reviews of beta software, rather than by reading the label and believing what the clueless Best Buy drone told her?

    I hope so. That is a court case I would watch.

  • by Dan541 ( 1032000 ) on Saturday November 22, 2008 @07:09PM (#25860615) Homepage

    Vista is a vast improvement over XP.

    Just about all the problems with it are from people using inferior hardware. You can't run XP on a commodore64 either.

  • by David Gerard ( 12369 ) <slashdot AT davidgerard DOT co DOT uk> on Saturday November 22, 2008 @08:21PM (#25861041) Homepage
    "Turing-equivalent to a Vista Ready machine!"
  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday November 22, 2008 @10:08PM (#25861713)

    actually.

    power corrupts, but powrpoint corrupts absolutly...

    What does this have to do with vodka?

Ya'll hear about the geometer who went to the beach to catch some rays and became a tangent ?

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