SCO's Lawsuit Gets Even Crazier 179
I Don't Believe in Imaginary Property writes "With SCO in Chapter 11 bankruptcy and there being little to read other than status reports and the boring financial details of how the company is wasting its last few dollars, one could be excused for thinking the SCO lawsuits had lost their zip. But things just got a bit more interesting. Jonathan Lee Riches has asked the court to take over. Yes, the man also known as inmate #40948-018 is now bringing his legal experience to the table, having previously filed pro se lawsuits against such entities as Michael Vick, Michael Jordan, Mickey Mantle, the Lincoln Memorial, the Thirteen Tribes of Israel, 'Various Buddhist Monks,' Mein Kampf, Denny's, George W. Bush, the Soviet Gulag Archipelago, Bellevue Hospital, Iran's Evin Prison, Auschwitz, and Plato. In his hand-written pro se motion (PDF), he asks to intervene as Plaintiff pursuant to FRCP 24(a)(2). As best anyone can read the motion, it appears that he offered Novell some 'royalty payments' and they refused them, so he wants to protect his UnixWare rights. He also claims to have proof of SCO's claims, but he wants take over part of the case via FRCP 24 because SCO isn't competent, and allegedly he could do a better job. To be fair, between him and Darl, it's something of a toss-up."
To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:5, Funny)
Hmm.. (Score:5, Funny)
To be fair, between him and Darl, it's something of a toss-up."
"Toss up"? You got that right.
Shawshank (Score:5, Funny)
Oh wait - I'm failing to separate fact from fiction...
Oh wait...
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:5, Funny)
Cellmates (Score:5, Funny)
I mean, it's the next logical step in this case, isn't it?
Fat chance. (Score:5, Funny)
Compared to SCO, this guy's lawsuit actually has a chance of succeeding.
don't forget... (Score:2, Funny)
Toss up? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Shawshank (Score:3, Funny)
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:1, Funny)
You'll be disappointed. Plato always exaggerated his numbers ten-fold. And most of what remained was stolen by Aristotle to build his philosopher's harem.
This makes me wanna say... (Score:1, Funny)
"Hey, knock it off Jonathan Lee Riches... you're actually making Darl McBride look sane by comparison!" And believe me... that's a feat which is not easily accomplished!
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:4, Funny)
Pfff I want to sue "Mein Kampf", I mean, how many times do you get to sue an inanimate object? (To be fair, the Lincoln Memorial probably has a staff..)
Crazier! (Score:2, Funny)
SCO's Lawsuit Gets Even Crazier
Well, now I, without a doubt, believe anything is possible. Perhaps even the most pessimistic being/thing in the universe would believe anything is possible after reading this line.
New name (Score:0, Funny)
I would officially like to name SCO the "Zombie Company" because, even though it's dead, it
just
won't
DIE
Re:Toss up? (Score:3, Funny)
So which one's going to be getting their salad tossed [urbandictionary.com], and which one's the eater? Or is it going to be a mutual thing?
Re:Goodness Gracious, Great Gobs of Dough! (Score:3, Funny)
The guy's either a certified loon or someone trying to pass himself off as one.
Honestly? His claims sound a lot like the religious tomes of Scientology.
Maybe he's bored, or waiting for the mother ship?
Re:Translation of PDF (Score:5, Funny)
Translation of this story: "Hey, let's laugh at that mentally ill person!"
If I was stuck in jail for 10 years, I'd be doing the same thing -- sucking as MUCH money out of the system as possible, just for something to do. Plus they might let him out to shut him up.
If anyone wants to know.... (Score:1, Funny)
... "pro se" means "for himself" in Latin, although, judging from this guy's record, I think "pars merdae" would be more appropriate. ;)
jdb2
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:4, Funny)
very low quality is a complement. I'm amazed people haven't died from eating that food.
Re:Translation of PDF (Score:5, Funny)
Tag request (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Goodness Gracious, Great Gobs of Dough! (Score:3, Funny)
That's 211 septillion, 429 sextillion, 399 quintillion dollars. To compare, the world's GDP (as of 2006) was $65.95 trillion. So the guy wanted over 3.2 TRILLION percent of the world's GDP.
Geeze, why not just go all the way and ask for "infinity U.S. dollars, in non-sequential bills"
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:5, Funny)
Wow, turns out some one tried to sue themselves for getting arrested. [lawsuit.no] >_
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:3, Funny)
Denny's is edible, the same as IHOP (international house of prostitution - aka watch out for the cottage cheese discharges)
There's something in chicago that's open 24 hours thats somewhat of an Ed Debevics equivalent, that is obviously more expensive (city tax) but legitimately a worthy eat...wish I remembered the name.
Of course, any restaurant thats open after midnight the first response is that "your mileage may vary" as every place at that point is likely some form of a risk to eat at.
Hey, hey, not so fast... (Score:3, Funny)
Darl may be mentally ill, but I can't be the only one withholding judgement on his status as a member of the human race until someone pays for independent review.
Of course, the very job of auditing Darl for evidence of humanity brings to mind the joke about lawyers v. labrats ('there are some things even a rat won't do').
Oh, you meant the cellmate?... um, Nevermind... </emily>
Re:SCO isn't competent? Ya think? (Score:5, Funny)
numerous judges have thrown his cases out, one referred to his case as 'farsical'
Wow, this nut writes his cases in Persian?
Re:Cellmates (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Translation of PDF (Score:4, Funny)
What was that about Denny's again?
Re:Daryl won (Score:4, Funny)
I aym iyn fulyl agreemenyt wityh yoyu.
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:4, Funny)
* WARNING: Consuming raw, undercooked food, or food from Denny's may increase your risk of food-borne illness.
699 trillion trillion of AWESOME you mean (Score:3, Funny)
Fucking Plato that rat bastid.
Re:Daryl won (Score:1, Funny)
Who's this Daryl person and what does he have to do with SCO?
Darl's next career (Score:3, Funny)
Playing the part of the Black Knight in Monty Python's Search for the Holy Grail.
"None shall pass!"
How did this not make TFA (Score:3, Funny)
Really worth reading the Justia link in groklaw:
http://news.justia.com/cases/jonathan-lee-riches/ [justia.com]
This might be my favorite
Plaintiff sued the Jena 6 for "Loss of My White Rights" and sought $100 million in white gold and the White House. Plaintiff alleged that defendants hung a white noose in his cell at FCI Willaimsburg, told the FCI Williamsburg dentists not to fix his white fillings, fed him tainted White Castle hamburgers, turn his cell mate into Snow White, called him the white Suge Knight, burnt him with Great Whites pyrotechnics, made him suffer whiteouts, gave him white phosphorus, subjected him to low white blood cell counts, and that Vanna White won't write. Defendants also allegedly turned plaintiff into a white collar criminal and sent Whitehouse prosecutors after his white skin.
This guy is definitely hilarious and not crazy.