White House Says Phone Wiretaps Will Resume For Now

austinhook brings us news that the U.S. government has resumed wiretapping with the help of telecommunications companies. The companies are said to have "understandable misgivings" over the unresolved issue of retroactive immunity for their participation in past wiretapping. Spy agencies have claimed that the expiration of the old legislation has caused them to miss important information. The bill that would grant the immunity passed in the Senate, but not in the House.

Darwinian M&M duels

[Anonymous Coward]

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

There can be only one.

Re:How do they know?

[ExecutorElassus]

Sorry, that information is classified for reasons of national security. You have an inappropriately strong interest in questioning the Terrorist Monitoring Program's scope; just whose side are you on?

Re:Darwinian M&M duels

[Soft Cosmic Rusk]

I must admit that I don't quite see the connection to TFA, but anyway: Would you please either stop doing that or pay my dentist bills?

Re:Free Speech.

[Anonymous Coward]

Congratulations, you have just been wiretapped.

Re:Free Speech.

[Anonymous Coward]

Why would you even have to think about it?

Re:Corporate intrest

[jimmydevice]

The lower the # the thicker the tin-foil?

oblig

[PieceofLavalamp]

yeah i've gotta admit i'd rather be constitutionally violated than shot in the face.

Re:News at 11

[MillionthMonkey]

There, I corrected that for you. Bush, like anyone else still afraid of "terrorists", is a huge pussy.

That's a lie. George Bush has never feared terrorists.

He just encourages the rest of you fear them, so he gets the power he needs to do Good Things for America.