Second Life & WoW Terrorist Training Camps?

Tech.Luver writes "theinquirer reports that 'Aussie Security experts claim that Second Life and online games such as World of Warcraft are being used to train terrorists. Apparently there are three jihadi terrorists registered and two elite jihadist terrorist groups in Second Life and they use the site for recruiting and training. This is on top of the Second Life Liberation Army.""

ROFLMAO

[SatanicPuppy]

Oh noes!

How do you kill...that which has no life?

No seriously, I think I saw a video of them training once [youtube.com](nsfw). They're in yer raids, ninjaing your epic loots.

Some people are so damn stupid. What bearing could this possibly have on real life? The only thing I can think of is that you're increasing the fat, out of shape, cheetoes consuming segment of the terrorist population...Scary stuff. They do enough of this "training", we could neutralize them with a gift of free broadband and some jolt cola.

The only way I'll believe that this is real is if we start getting evidence of terrorist attacks on gold farmers.

I thought

[saibot834]

And I thought they were trained in those small trucks (Powell showed us) in Iraq. I was wrong. They are trained in the tubes.

Wow

[thatskinnyguy]

This is news... The terrorists have less of a life than we do!

Irak

[CmdrGravy]

I thought Iraq was the main terrorist training camp, now that they can use 2nd life instead I'd expect things to calm down there a lot.

Gotta be -1 redundant

[Himring]

...by the time I post this:

If you play wow, you're supporting the terrorists!

Or,

So that's where they kept the WMDs.... In Ironforge!

Second life terrorists?

[Anonymous Coward]

I'll believe it when I see a national landmark knocked over by a flying penis.

Re:I knew it!

[clickclickdrone]

>I just knew there was something fishy about that bukkake garden!
They'll come to a sticky end, no doubt.

Re:ROFLMAO

[dc29A]

I *REALLY* hope they'll use WoW as a training camp. It's the only way we'll win this "War on Terror". The terrorists will be confused by very different laws of physics in the real world.

I can picture it already ... Terrorist sees an airplane, jumps on a bird thinking it has the same abilities as a netherdrake in WoW and tries to fly to intercept plane and make it crash with his Fireball rank XII spell. Or better, they'll work in gold farming sweatshops trying to "subvert" the "evil" western economies!

Alliance or Horde?

[andrewd18]

The real question here is, "Is the US Military the Alliance or the Horde?"

Re:ROFLMAO

[dpilot]

Come on, put your tinfoil hat on for a moment...

This means that Second Life and WoW have become terrorist-affiliated/terrorist-supporting orgainizations.
That means that everyone subscribing to Second Life or WoW now have financial links to terrorism.
Therefore :
    Everyone on Second Life and WoW is open game for DHS, warrantless wiretaps, asset freezing, etc.

(silly sarcasm, frightening Orwellian reality, or absurd conspiracy theory, you decide.)

Re:ROFLMAO

[dreamchaser]

I didn't know that caves had basements!!!

We need an inside man, some human intel...

[Dareth]

And we have the perfect operative for the job. Someone who can blend in with the terrorist and provide this intel.

The only agent for this job is none other than LEEROY JENKINS [leeroyjenkins.net]!

It's true!

[Experiment 626]

It's true. According to documents recently captured by the CIA, some of the plots they are working on include:

• "Get up to 375 in Goblin Engineering so we can build better improvised explosive devices"
• "Crash epic flying mounts into buildings instead of airliners"
• "Build a Mana Bomb like those blood elves east of Shattrath City have"
• "Stock up on +sneak gear and enchants so we can stealth past the Secret Service and crit-backstab President Bush"
• "Recruit an Enchanter to our cause so we can get Fiery cast on our AK-47's, for the nice glow and DPS increase" (Bin Laden vetoed this one, saying "You can only put enchants on melee weapons, n00b")

WoW trained terrorists

[jayhawk88]

Baffling news today from the West Bank, where officials arrested six terrorists who were attempting to attack a local market. Apparently the terrorists tried to execute their attack by teasing several vicious dogs they found wandering in a nearby alley, then leading the dogs to the market as they ran towards it. Witnesses say that the terrorists ran into the market, waited until the dogs were right on top of them, then attempted to confuse the dogs in various ways. One terrorist wrapped himself in a camoflage cloak and hid behind a fruit vendors stand, while several others simply laid on the ground and played dead. All six terrorists were hospitalized with bite and claw wounds to their face and arms.

Great!

[schiefaw]

Once they get playing they won't be willing to quit long enough to attack in real life.

"Ahmad, we must go fight the Americans now."
"Maybe later, I am in an instance."

Comment removed

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

somebody call Jack!

[Lurker2288]

ACTUAL bad guys learning and practicing their horrific murder skills in a virtual environment?

Somewhere, Jack Thompson just got a chubby.

Re:ROFLMAO

[tehcyder]

Come on, put your tinfoil hat on for a moment...

What, you mean you take yours off sometimes?!

Re:ROFLMAO

[mdwh2]

On the other hand, I'm wondering if Bush will decide to invade WoW as part of the "War on Terror".

Is there any oil there?

Last thing I need to hear ...

[YetAnotherProgrammer]

when on a plane being hijacked. "We are the 1337 jihad. All your planes are belong to us. You just got pwn3d."

Re:Eh.

[Opportunist]

Sorry, sir. This is terrorhype. Logic and reason is in the next room.

Re:ROFLMAO

[PakProtector]

On the other hand, I'm wondering if Bush will decide to invade WoW as part of the "War on Terror".

Is there any oil there?

Not since WarCraft II's expansion.

Second Life Terrorists

[Ray Radlein]

We must remain vigilant: This could be provide all the training would-be terrorists need to run around buying furry porn, attachable penises, and sparkly glowy rotating particle effects in real life.

Re:Alliance or Horde?

[Hambone_dot_exe]

"...A formal investigation was announced today by Northshire Township Marshall Lunde following the alleged incidents at what is now being called 'Kobold-Ghraib.'"

"Demihuman Rights Commission workers denounced the actions of low-ranking Paladins who were wintessed assaulting non-combatant kobold workers, but were quick to blame a military and civilian command which they say creates an atmosphere of deniability."

"The word they used was 'exterminate,' reported one novice, who spoke on the condition of anonymity. 'They told us that the only way to advance was to walk into the mine, stomp on a bunch of civilians, and then bring back their candles. Besides, do you know what the resale value on a candle is?'"

"In light of these actions, animal-rights activists are also planning litigation against a dwarvish hunter's guild for what they describe as a 'wanton slaughter of a noble and endangered species of non-aggressive wolf,' resulting in the slaughter of dozens of the animals, who were then harvested for their ruined pelts, broken fangs and stringy wolf meat."

"Stormwind officials declined comment and could not be reached for an interview at the time of this story."

"Kobold delegates were quoted as saying, 'you no take candle.'"

Re:Look at the bright side...

[Dancindan84]

Or counter-strike. God help us if they figure out that running with their knives out is faster.

Re:ROFLMAO

[Hoi Polloi]

When the FBI came for the trolls,
I remained silent;
I was not a troll.

When they locked up the orcs,
I remained silent;
I was not an orc.

When they came for the dark elves,
I did not speak out;
I was not a dark elf.

When they came for me,
there was no one left to subscribe.

Re:Irak

[Anonymous Coward]

Freedom isn't free, it's $39.99 up front and $15/month recurring.

Re:ROFLMAO

[Hoi Polloi]

You think it's funny, eh? Well we'll see how funny it is when the terrorists come on their flying mounts wearing their epic gear and raid your family!

Re:Eh.

[oxidiser]

"The only way to win is to make them not want to train." Perhaps by getting them hooked on WoW... Oh, wait.

This is good news...

[Cervantes]

This is really good news. The military job in Iraq just got easier. Now all the terrorists will be easy to spot. They'll be the ones standing in the middle of the market square holding a big bomb, waiting for 5 minutes for the square to fully render, cursing about lag.

Re:ROFLMAO

[Maserati]

Can I have your stuff ?

Re:ROFLMAO

[forand]

I know he does so don't listen to him they are controlling his mind!

Not the Liberation Army of Second Life?

[sharkey]

This is on top of the Second Life Liberation Army.

Splitters!

HA HA HA...

[UID30]

... and it's not even April 1.

*Terrorist #1: "What do you mean I have a squid on my face?"
*Terrorist #2: screw this guys. we don't even have a prophet in our group. i'm going fishing.

Only one way to stop them...

[dbrecht]

Salzman from Accounting saw this day coming... We must use the Sword of a Thousand Truths!!!

Re:ROFLMAO

[Opportunist]

Wait, they have indoor plumbing and air conditioning in a cave?

I'll move!

Re:ROFLMAO

[Anonymous Coward]

(put tinfoil hat)
      Linden Labs
      Lin denla bs
      Bin denla ls
      Bin Laden SL
Hurry... someone must advice the CIA! :p

Re:We could learn from this

[Cappy Red]

All we need to do is find their graveyard and camp in it -- their equipments will be damaged when they respawn

I heard that when they respawn they're surrounded by 72 virgins [slashdot.org].

You mean they're surrounded by 72 other players?

*rimshot*

*notices parent made roughly the same joke*

*slumps away and sulks*

Re:ROFLMAO

[tbannist]

So obviously, they're all rolling Blood Elves.

Re:We could learn from this

[mrogers]

*notices parent made roughly the same joke*

*slumps away and sulks*

*notices that you got modded up for it but I didn't*

*slumps away and plots the downfall of the infidel West*