Federal Agencies To Collect Genetic Info 428
protagoras writes "According to a bill approved by the Senate Judiciary Committee, suspects arrested or detained by federal authorities may have their DNA forcibly collected for permanent storage in a central database. The bill is supported by the White House as well, but has not yet gone to the floor for a vote. Current law permits this only for those convicted of a crime. So even though completely innocent, should the Feds decide to detain you for any reason, your genetic data will grace their database beside that from murders, terrorists, and other miscreants." From the article: "The provision, co-sponsored by Kyl and Sen. John Cornyn (R-Tex.), does not require the government to automatically remove the DNA data of people who are never convicted. Instead, those arrested or detained would have to petition to have their information removed from the database after their cases were resolved. Privacy advocates are especially concerned about possible abuses such as profiling based on genetic characteristics."
Ha! (Score:5, Funny)
Gattaca, here we come.
Excellent (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Anti-conservative Republicans. (Score:5, Funny)
Great (Score:5, Funny)
The reason why they want this (Score:5, Funny)
I'm surprised at all the uproar over this. If you are arrested, but later cleared, your fingerprints are still kept. When is the last time your local police station returned your fingerprint card?
I have been arrested and later the charges were dropped. I didn't get my fingerprints back, and I'm pretty sure they could be in a municipal or state database. Fingerprints, like DNA, are unique. Its essentially the same thing.
I found the best way to avoid false incrimination is to not leave my DNA at crime scenes.
Federal DNA DataBanking (Score:2, Funny)
to remedy that pesky budget problem he has created
since his appointment by the Supreme Court.
Insurance companies will pay a fortune for this data.
Marketing and sales of the DNA data can be subcontracted
to a deserving large donor/contractor like Halliburton.
Large data-centric corporations can bid on the data
with off-the-books donations to the Republican Party.
If only we could identify and track the DNA coding for
liberalism, populist tendencies, honesty,and fiscal
responsibility, we could sterilize, imprison, and/or
eliminate that treasonous segment of the population.
Enter Private Industry (Score:4, Funny)
Step 1. Detain suspect.
Step 2. Obtain DNA.
Step 3. Sell DNA to private companies for various research
Step 4. Profit!!
From private companies point of view.
Step 1. Obtain ultra cheap source of DNA.
Step 2. Patent private citizens DNA sequences.
Step 3. Profit!!
From Joe averages point of view.
Step 1. Get arrested, detained and have DNA sample taken.
Step 2. Be released without charge.
Step 3. Have results of own DNA sold back to self.
Step 4. ???
Step 5. Profit.
God bless capitalizm. So much better than all that capitalism rubbish with its silly respect for people and all that rubbish.
Pennies (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Anti-conservative Republicans. (Score:2, Funny)
just one more reason to be glad i'm not american (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Meh (Score:3, Funny)
Whew. That's creepy. Here come the police: they're searching your house, not for duck porn or drugs or guns, but for your SKIN. That would seriously make me feel like some creepy stalker, if I were a cop and had to visit some guy's house just to swab his toilet seat for a sample of his ass.
So... (Score:1, Funny)
Re:This is especially troubling... (Score:2, Funny)
Can we just give Texas Back... (Score:1, Funny)