Microsoft's Bold Patent Move

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Microsoft's Bold Patent Move 571

Posted by CmdrTaco on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:07PM from the is-this-actually-real dept.

theodp writes "On Thursday, the USPTO disclosed that Microsoft has a patent pending for displaying numbers in a box to make them stand out. " Check out the images to see the power of this breakthrough patent. That's almost impossible to do without patents.

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Microsoft's Bold Patent Move

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Next: Microsoft patents the patent (Score:4, Funny)

by venicebeach ( 702856 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:11PM (#13304522) Homepage Journal

I'm sure they are working on a patent that covers the process of applying for a patent.

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From the patent application: (Score:5, Funny)

by Stanistani ( 808333 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:14PM (#13304551) Homepage Journal

One of the inventors is named -

Thiti Wang-Aryattawanich

I'd just like to know his nickname, is all...

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Re:Well... (Score:3, Funny)

by Trigun ( 685027 ) writes: <evil@evil e m p i r e . a t h .cx> on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:15PM (#13304559)

Yep, this is right up there with the Lempel Ziv algorithms, definitely not something that could be done easily with a regex.

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I read the entire patent application. (Score:3, Funny)

by mikeophile ( 647318 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:17PM (#13304583)

I am now dumber for the effort.

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Re:Hey... Microsoft? (Score:1, Funny)

by thc69 ( 98798 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:18PM (#13304603) Homepage Journal

Great...thanks a lot. Now I've got the new Clutch song, "10001110101" stuck in my head...

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Why not patent this: (Score:3, Funny)

by rscrawford ( 311046 ) writes: <rscrawford&undavis,edu> on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:19PM (#13304610) Homepage Journal

Has anyone come up with a patent for bringing down a website by posting a link to it on another website and counting on thousands and thousands of people to click through, thus generating high but perfectly legal traffic?

If not, I'm filling out my forms right now, and someone around here's gonna owe me a lot of money.

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Re:Prior art (Score:4, Funny)

by exp(pi*sqrt(163)) ( 613870 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:19PM (#13304615) Journal

Does it highlight the word 'thousand'. You young whippersnappers, you think you know it all. But it took billions of dollars for MS to figure out how to highlight numbers written as words.

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Re:Am I dumb? (Score:5, Funny)

by kwiqsilver ( 585008 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:19PM (#13304620)

My guess is that the submitter looked at the pretty pictures and jumped to conclusions.

No /. poster would ever do such a thing! Especially not if his first glance at the story could show microsoft in a bad light.
And even if a poster did such a thing, it would never get through /.'s fact checking department.

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Another Idea (Score:2, Funny)

by $RANDOMLUSER ( 804576 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:20PM (#13304631)

I wish Slashdot would put a "Fuck Microsoft" button on the comment submittal page - it would save sooo much time for all of us.

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Wow! Innovative! (Score:5, Funny)

by rlp ( 11898 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:27PM (#13304723)

+----------+ | Amazing! | +----------+

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Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

by JavaTHut ( 9877 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:29PM (#13304735) Homepage

I can't really tell if the purpose of this post was actually to bash Microsoft, or an elaborate DDOS plot to take out the Patent system by putting a link to its website labeled "microsoft bad" on slashdot.

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I've got MS right where I want them... (Score:3, Funny)

by sRev ( 846312 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:30PM (#13304751)

I've just patented using letters to form words.

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Re:I read the entire patent application. (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:34PM (#13304783)

That's negative information [slashdot.org] for you...

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Re:Quick, lets patent DNA! (Score:5, Funny)

by AKAImBatman ( 238306 ) * writes: <akaimbatman@gmaYEATSil.com minus poet> on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:37PM (#13304814) Homepage Journal

That's right. For example, the military holds a patent on "A gene present in an Ancient space-faring culture, that is used as a security device for preventing alien access to sensitive technological equipment."

The claims made are:

"By inserting the gene into a compatible host via a retrovirus, that host becomes capable of using and activating advanced equipment left behind by our now dead anscestors who just happened to invent the Latin language."

I mean, does that sound rediculous or what? The patent office should go back to requiring working models of an invention as proof! ;-)

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Re:Next: Microsoft patents the patent (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:39PM (#13304836)

Sorry, that has already been filed by Jeff Bezos.

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Re:Well... (Score:3, Funny)

by TCM ( 130219 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:39PM (#13304843)

It may look ugly but it's quite simple.

Aren't the two mutually exclusive?

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Re:Post Text Missing? (Score:2, Funny)

by dogwelder99 ( 896835 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:42PM (#13304863)

The headline was generated using Microsoft's new technology for highlighting any words referring to 'numbers'. Course, there are still a couple bugs to be worked out.

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That's... um.... creepy, dude. (Score:3, Funny)

by Valdrax ( 32670 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:42PM (#13304867)

Note to self: Never sign any public petition for fear of being stalked by creepy people on the net or their friends with access to Google.

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bad news/good news (Score:5, Funny)

by moosesocks ( 264553 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:44PM (#13304887) Homepage

I've got some bad news and some good news.

The bad news is that the USPTO granted Microsoft assanine patent.

The good news is that we slashdotted the USPTO (and I just saved a bundle on my car insurance)

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Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

by menkhaura ( 103150 ) writes: <espinafre@gmail.com> on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:46PM (#13304904) Homepage Journal

It may look ugly but it's quite simple.

Aren't the two mutually exclusive?

It's Perl we are talking about here...

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Re:Uh oh! (Score:5, Funny)

by mtdenial ( 769442 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:48PM (#13304920)

Heh. A close friend of mine is a Canadian patent examiner. A month or two ago, I got an email basically complaining about how the USPTO site was slow. Coincidentally, there was a /. story on patents on the front page. A couple of weeks later, same thing happened. I mentioned it this time and /. gained a new casual reader.

Not 5 minutes ago, I recieved an email consisting of, and I quote, "Goddamned slashdot linked the USPTO again during work hours, guess I'm staying late today..."

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Re:Simple Solution (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:51PM (#13304950)

I'm with the other AC. Kill the bastards.

(No offense to any aforementioned bastards in the audience. :P)

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Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

by mrdaveb ( 239909 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:53PM (#13304963) Homepage

It may look ugly but it's quite simple.

Aren't the two mutually exclusive?

No, I've met quite a few people that are both ugly and simple.

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Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

by Master of Transhuman ( 597628 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:55PM (#13304981) Homepage

Hell, no, they aren't mutually exclusive.

Look at George Bush.

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Only in natural languages! (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @12:59PM (#13305035)

4. The method of claim 3, wherein the numerical data may be expressed in any of a plurality of natural languages.

At least binary and hex are still safe!

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It may look ugly? (Score:3, Funny)

by FhnuZoag ( 875558 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @01:17PM (#13305206)

That is fucking beautiful, man.

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Re:CSS (Score:5, Funny)

by egriebel ( 177065 ) * writes: <edgriebel AT gmail DOT com> on Friday August 12, 2005 @01:23PM (#13305267) Journal

In any case, I seriously doubt that you'd see this applied to any cases except as a defense.

Biggest lies ever told (apologies for off-color reference):
1. The check is in the mail
2. Don't worry, I won't come in your mouth
3. We're from the government and we're here to help
4. This patent is only for defense

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Re:Am I dumb? (Score:2, Funny)

by Amouth ( 879122 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @01:33PM (#13305371)

they have a fact checking department.. can i meet them.. i have a few tools of distruction that they forgot to put on last weeks poll

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Re:Well... (Score:2, Funny)

by PerlPenguin ( 802434 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @01:47PM (#13305491)

I for one welcome our new number-highlighting overlords.

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Alright, now you've done it. (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @02:04PM (#13305664)

Wait a second... Yiddish spelling Nazi?!?!?!

Godwin's law strikes again!

Uhhh, This thread's over now.

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Re:From the patent application: (Score:2, Funny)

by DrewCapu ( 132301 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @02:06PM (#13305688) Journal

I'm thinking Titty Wang
You're half right. It's Titty Titty Wang Wang.

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Re:Well... (Score:3, Funny)

by Tongo ( 644233 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @02:13PM (#13305749)

Yo mama's so ugly....

A perl regular expression beat her in a beauty contest!

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Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

by NickFortune ( 613926 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @02:15PM (#13305774) Homepage Journal

Perl's a write-only programming language, after all.
No it isn't. Although, to be fair, it does have exceptional support for write only programmers

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Re:Well... (Score:3, Funny)

by sraak ( 557865 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @03:03PM (#13306228)

i had that idea before you. my lawyers will contact you.

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You Laugh... (Score:2, Funny)

by BishonenAngstMagnet ( 797469 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @03:30PM (#13306455)

Next week, Microsoft will patent numbers, period.

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An even bolder patent move (Score:2, Funny)

by highspl ( 523486 ) writes: on Friday August 12, 2005 @04:43PM (#13307205)

http://home.att.net/~jbcole/humor/Microsoft_patent s.htm [att.net]

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There may be more comments in this discussion. Without JavaScript enabled, you might want to turn on Classic Discussion System in your preferences instead.

Next: Microsoft patents the patent (Score:4, Funny)

From the patent application: (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:3, Funny)

I read the entire patent application. (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Hey... Microsoft? (Score:1, Funny)

Why not patent this: (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Prior art (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Am I dumb? (Score:5, Funny)

Another Idea (Score:2, Funny)

Wow! Innovative! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

I've got MS right where I want them... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:I read the entire patent application. (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Quick, lets patent DNA! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Next: Microsoft patents the patent (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Post Text Missing? (Score:2, Funny)

That's... um.... creepy, dude. (Score:3, Funny)

bad news/good news (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Uh oh! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Simple Solution (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

Only in natural languages! (Score:1, Funny)

It may look ugly? (Score:3, Funny)

Re:CSS (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Am I dumb? (Score:2, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:2, Funny)

Alright, now you've done it. (Score:1, Funny)

Re:From the patent application: (Score:2, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Well... (Score:3, Funny)

You Laugh... (Score:2, Funny)

An even bolder patent move (Score:2, Funny)

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