Russians Claim Their Hackers the Best In the World 551
Ant writes "ZDNet UK reports that Russians who once hacked for fun are now teaming up to get rich through cybercrime, according to police. The Russian cybercrime division, known as Department K, has warned that Russian hackers are the best in the world. From the article: 'Everyone knows that Russians are good at math...Our software writers are the best in the world, that's why our hackers are the best in the world.'"
Pity... (Score:5, Funny)
I guess by "best" they mean "second best."
Sorry (Score:2, Funny)
of course (Score:5, Funny)
A lot of script kiddies claim that..
Re:If Russians are so good at math... (Score:1, Funny)
Re:-1 Flamebait (Score:5, Funny)
I'm sure we'll find out soon, all over the front pages of Department K's website, along with the strange Chinese term "0wn3d".
Sure... (Score:4, Funny)
Always look on the bright side. (Score:4, Funny)
Big Holes (Score:5, Funny)
All they need is an IBM computer with 14.400 bps modem 2x cd-rom and and a lot of cigarettes. That's it!
No no.. I know. You say, what about babe.. but no. The 2x cd-rom is what made it magic.
Proper form (Score:2, Funny)
In school you couldn't hack mathematics.
In Soviet Russia, mathematicians hack YOU!
(apologies, but it's been a while since anyone observed proper form for Soviet Russia-jokes :-)
The purpose of this story (Score:2, Funny)
-1 meme-bait.
Heh. (Score:5, Funny)
Re:-1 Flamebait (Score:2, Funny)
Probably something like "fuck USA Government - fuck PoizonBOx" only forgetting to close the TABLE tag.
*sigh* (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Sure... (Score:1, Funny)
Mr Europe, I'd like to introduce you to the word 'corruption'. Take some time, get aquainted, I'm sure that as you look around the world (and even in your namesake's neck of the wood!) you'll find many appropriate uses for it.
Re:-1 Flamebait (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Heh. (Score:2, Funny)
Re:-1 Flamebait (Score:3, Funny)
Of course they didn't, everyone knows that. The British did!
Ha! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:-1 Flamebait (Score:5, Funny)
Heh. (Score:3, Funny)
Anyways, reminds me of a joke that was doing the rounds during the Cold War in India. An American, Russian and Indian cop meet up at an international police conference. They get to bragging about their respective police forces.
"Y'know, back home in Texas, if a man commits a crime, he'll be safely in custody by the next day. We're that good."
The Russian laughs, and says, "Next day?? Comrade, in Soviet Russia, the KGB track everybody so well, that if somebody commits a crime we know who, what and why, and have arrested the criminal that very day itself!"
Not to be outdone, the Indian cop laughs in turn. "I can't believe how lazy you are in the First World", he says, "In India, the police are paid to hush up a crime WEEKS in advance!"
Just as Oasis (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Pity... (Score:2, Funny)
Maybe they are just too busy running their evil empires to compete in competitions?
Re:Well (Score:5, Funny)
Double Sorry (Score:2, Funny)
Therefore, in Soviet Russia, forgiveness for the corny post finds you (!)
They did get one thing right (Score:3, Funny)
Re:-1 Flamebait (Score:3, Funny)
You have not read Knuth (Score:5, Funny)
(I hear the Klingon translation is also quite good.)
Re:-1 Flamebait (Score:2, Funny)
What about Redmond? (Score:1, Funny)
I find this somewhat offensive. I live near Redmond, and well ... oh nevermind.
Re:-1 Flamebait (Score:2, Funny)
It is very cold in Russia, so people are inside all the time on the computer.
Their economy crashed and they can't afford fast machines that run games nicely, so they are stuck with the linux bash shell to entertain themselves.
If you were stuck inside all the time with only a 486 linux box and your government was too busy to worry about computer crimes, maybe you would develop some good hacking skills too.
Yeah... (Score:1, Funny)