Man Finds $1,000 Prize in EULA 446
bhtooefr writes "When Doug Heckman was installing a PC Pitstop program, he actually read the EULA. In it, he found a clause stating that he could get financial compensation if he e-mailed PC Pitstop. The result: a $1,000 check, and proof that people don't read EULAs (3,000 people before him didn't notice it). The goal of this was to prove that one should read all EULAs, so that one can see if an app is spyware if it is buried in the EULA."
GIVE ME MONEY (Score:3, Funny)
Reading every EULA? (Score:4, Funny)
Excellent (Score:1, Funny)
Ctrl-F (Score:4, Funny)
$1,000 for reading all the way through EULAs? (Score:5, Funny)
Mmmm. That's a tough one, but I'll have to pass on the $1,000.
Too many look like that Gator one - pages and pages of gobbledy-gook and mumbo jumbo which ultimately translate to all your base are belong to us.
Cereal Port (Score:5, Funny)
hmm... money? (Score:2, Funny)
Of all the bad luck ... (Score:5, Funny)
that does it... (Score:2, Funny)
Steve Mann's Ouijagree (Score:5, Funny)
Now the question is... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:yea let's make society crazy (Score:3, Funny)
And yet the princess was pretty venal, expecting to take advantage of the little dude. Ain't no saints in that story.
That's the point
Re:No Kidding (Score:5, Funny)
Now, flightdeck was the most boring game you could imagine, and one night after a hard days work a couple of guys sat in the place where we worked and decided to liven things up a bit. Every so many thousand games one of the elevators in the carrier would go down, a guy would stand on it, the elevator would go up again, he'd strip on the deck and jump off the ship...
This lead to the most baffling support calls of people that really could literally not believe that they'd just seen what they'd seen, and of course we never let the support guys in on the joke...
to give you an idea of how long ago this was, the atari ST was the best machine you could get for little $, 68 K assembler was the way to go for fast games and the Dire Straits had just released "Brothers in Arms"
Re:Of all the bad luck ... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Cereal Port (Score:5, Funny)
Only took 3000 users? (Score:5, Funny)
Unfortunately, that $1000 check (Score:5, Funny)
Cut 'n' Paste, baby (Score:5, Funny)
Best one I've seen so far: reading the EULA for a RPG dice rolling program, I find this:
Section 3.a.i: This software is a guitar utility. This is a learning tool.
A dice roller that teaches you to play the guitar? Now that's a feature!
Re:Of all the bad luck ... (Score:5, Funny)
Company XYZ hereby agrees to pay me $1,000,000.
Now that's a contract I can agree to!
text of EULA from article (Score:2, Funny)
Re:No Kidding (Score:5, Funny)
Heh. I buried something like that in an essay I wrote in English Class. I had a teacher that just piled and piled and piled work on us. I was CERTAIN she didn't read through everything. "If you read this far, I owe ya a soda." I don't know which was worse: Being wrong about my teacher not reading my work, or being out 50 cents.
Re:fp master (Score:1, Funny)
n0, j00, 51r, 4r3 t3h s|_|(|. j00 ph41l3d 2 g37 fP, 4$$|-|phux0r. 1 4m t3h 0|/|3 wH0 15 1337 4r0uNd
Re:$1,000 for reading all the way through EULAs? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Of all the bad luck ... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:No Kidding (Score:2, Funny)
I did that in an English class once. The teacher seemed to accept just about anything as an answer, so I figured she was just checking to see if every question was answered. One day I answered the question with "I bet you don't even read these." When I got the assignment back, she had written "Yes, I do." in the margin. At the end of the quarter she admitted that she usually didn't, but her eyes just happened to fall on that sentence.
Common End User License Agreement (Score:5, Funny)
----
YOUR_COMPANY_NAME_HERE ("Company") makes this copy of NAME_OF_YOUR_SOFTWARE_PRODUCT ("Software") available to you ("Licensee") under terms of this End User License Agreement ("EULA"). By installing software you agree to be bound by the terms contained herein.
LIMITATION OF LIABILITY
Company makes no guarantee of any kind, and waives all implied warranties including mercantibility and fitness for a particular purpose. Company shall not be held liable for any damage, personal injury, deaths, loss of profits, growth of additional organs, or any other injury or debt suffered by licensee due to any negligence, fraud, or other criminal or civil breach of contract or law committed by company. Licensee will hold company harmless under all circumstances in perpetuity.
PARTICIPATION IN GAINS
Company shall participate in the profits, advantages, or other benefits that the licensee experiences as a result of installing, using, or otherwise having anything to do with software no matter how remote or mundane. Company reserves the right to inspect the records of licensees business, premises, or person at any time for any reason to determine if it is entitled to a share of licensee's gains.
GRANTING OF ALL RIGHTS
Licensee gives software and company the right to do do anything it wants to your property or person for any reason. See limitation of liability and participation in gains for more information.
SEVERABILITY
Should a court of any kind find any part of this agreement unenforceable, the remainder of the agreement shall still have full force and effect.
IMMUNITY FROM LAW
No court shall have the power to enforce any of these provisions against the company, but shall have unlimited power to enforce any provision against the licensee. Licensee accepts the jurisdiction of any court.
RECOVERY OF FEES
Licensee must reimburse company for all enforcement fees incurred as a result of any action, in addition to paying a $100,000,000 penalty to the company, whether or not its action is justified.
GOOD FAITH AND DUE CONSIDERATION
Licensee declines any due consideration in accepting this EULA. Licensee accepts this agreement in good faith and verifies that they have read it and understood it in its entirety even if they just scrolled to the end and clicked OK without so much as glancing at it.
RESTRICTIONS ON REDISTRIBUTION
Licensee may not redistribute software in any way. Licensee may not format shift or space shift this software. Licensee waives all fair use rights, including the right to make a backup copy. Backup copies may be purchased from company for a (large) fee.
RESTRICTIONS ON USE
Licensee can only use the software for its intended purposes. We'll let you know what its intended purpose is when we catch you doing it and bring costly legal action against you.
Licensee must discontinue use of software and upgrade when company decides software has reached its end of life.
REVERSE ENGINEERING
Don't even think about it unless you've got really deep pockets so we can sue you for everything.
Sorry, still nobody will read it (Score:4, Funny)
Even Software Companies.
Your brand-new generic-EULA is so faithful that I can't even read the first paragraph.
Contratulations.
Please, can somebody explain me the funny part of this CEULA?
Re:No Kidding (Score:3, Funny)
Re:No Kidding (Score:2, Funny)
And if you used "ya" in an English essay, I hope she docked you
Re:No Kidding (Score:2, Funny)
And she didn't
Re:No Kidding (Score:5, Funny)
At the point where he asked me to sign my formal review, I had to confess.
That reminds me of a prank.... (Score:5, Funny)
Unfortunately, an otherwise excellent paper that I got back had a red pen circle around a certain phrase on the 9th page, with the comment "proofread" written next to it.
Re:No Kidding (Score:3, Funny)
Re:$1,000 for reading all the way through EULAs? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Er... (Score:2, Funny)
$100,000 for new servers which can handle the Slashdotting.
Re:No Kidding (Score:1, Funny)
HA! You are such losers and I'm a real man, cause I can give digital girls orgasms! HA! And that I'll never find a real girl doesn't matter at all!!11one