McBride's New Open Letter on Copyrights

dtfinch writes "An open letter was posted today by Darl McBride, where he restates his claim that the GPL violates the U.S. Constitution, patent laws, copyright laws, and the DMCA. Mostly he just builds up a false image of the Free Software Foundation and open source supporters claiming that they have no respect for intellectual property and believe copyrights should be eliminated, then attacks that image, AKA the straw man attack. Nothing we haven't seen before."

Irony abounds.

[cgranade]

Hm... Darl McBride writes an open letter. I thought that openness was against the US Constitution, ad nauseum.

closed source please

[Camel Pilot]

Hey Dayl please keep your letters like the Unix source and your mind - closed.

Left something out?

[KarMann]

What, nothing about it violating the Ten Commandments to boot?

Yep, the GPL is REALLY BAD!

[Anonymous Coward]

Darl missed a few salient points that I will enumerate:

1) The GPL kills small cute furry animals.
2) The GPL causes cancer in laboratory animals.
3) The GPL encourages terrorism.
4) It hurts THE CHILDREN.
5) Reciting the text of the GPL backwards will cause the appearance of the Anti-Christ and will initiate the apocalypse.

The open letter they discarded

[beej]

Dear Fucking Linux Hippies,

Why can't you just pay us. You know you want to.
Love, SCO

[Shamelessly ripped from a couple friends of mine. This edition Copyright 2003 by Beej Jorgensen.]

Re:Irony abounds.

[pr0f3550r]

I think he feels that if he repeats his diatribe often enough that even he will begin to believe it.

Crack Smoking and Prostitution

[Camel Pilot]

From this article [infoworld.com] is one the best quotes from Linus yet:

I'm a big believer in copyrights," Torvalds wrote in an e-mail interview. "Of all the intellectual property (laws), copyright ... is the only one that is expressly designed so that individual people can (and do) get them without having scads of lawyers on their side."

"If Darl McBride was in charge, he'd probably make marriage unconstitutional too, since clearly it de-emphasizes the commercial nature of normal human interaction, and probably is a major impediment to the commercial growth of prostitution," he wrote.

Amusing Circular logic

[alangmead]

According to Darl, the GPL is designed to take profit incentive out of copyright ownership. Copyright is defined in the Constitution. In the case of Eldrid v. Ashcroft, the Supreme Court decided that the constitution's description of copyright existing to an advancement of arts and sciences includes the possibility of profit as a motivation. So, according to Darl, The GPL is unconstitutional.

I've read other odd things that he has said, but this seems to be a new one.

Re:Irony abounds.

[AndroidCat]

Yeah, but he probably believes the mothership will rescue him when this all falls apart. He certainly believes in the nose-candy fairy.

Re:Nothing we haven't seen before

[Nucleon500]

True, but this is the first time in a while we've attempted to slashdot them.

Closed Letter

[Ieshan]

Dear Person Reading this Letter:

You are in violation of copyright law, as I have copyrighted this letter and encoded it using an advanced version of english which we have developed at SCO group.. Each sentence, as you can see, ends in two puncuation marks, however, you seem to be able to read the text just fine..

We regret to inform you that there is no possible other implementation for this english derivative, is our copyright, and therefore, you must be circumventing our extremely intelligent and work with the intent of profit..

Sincerely,
Darl McBride

Better duck!

[Anonymous Coward]

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Re:basis in law!

[jelle]

Who cares? The only relevant question is: "Does Chewbacca live on Endor" [google.com]?

details here [gamecockcentral.com]...

He Loves Us After All!

[Anonymous Coward]

> Internet chat boards are filled with attacks against SCO,...

Yay! We got a mention!

Ok.... I'm Drunk....

[zulux]

I just came back from a night out.... and I'm drunk...

and...

I see this little peice of shit Darle McFuckwit with his stupid "open letter" a I just skimed it...

So... I pronunce Darle is a complete nin-com-poop. Even drunks like me can see that he's an idiot.

I'm fucking drunk and I'm smarter than everybody at SCO!!!!!

Top ten reaons why Darl is doing this

[Anonymous Coward]

10. Because L. Ron Hubbard told him to.

Re:Yep, the GPL is REALLY BAD!

[dominion]

5) Reciting the text of the GPL backwards will cause the appearance of the Anti-Christ and will initiate the apocalypse.

Y'know, that's not wholly untrue. I did that a few years back, when everybody thought Gore had won.

Re:Yep, the GPL is REALLY BAD!

[jelle]

8) Makes the milk in the cows go sour
9) Costs you VOTES
10) Increase lethal accident rates
11) Increases crime rates
12) Electrocutes birds
13) Contains dangerous amounts of bacteria
14) Causes hurricanes and earthquakes
15) Second-hand GPL kills people
16) Eats away at 401k-plans
17) Causes rolling blackouts
18) Is illegal but has a california drivers license (but mows your lawn)
18b) Makes tasteless jokes
19) Doesn't give enough change back at the register
20) Has cooties
21) Breaks for no apparent reason
22) Cuts people off in traffic
23) Doesn't signal for a turn
24) Skips commercials on TV.
25) Downloads Music from the Internet
26) Masturbates daily
27) Doesn't go to church
28) Uses coarse language including F-words a lot
29) Keeps the toilet seat up
30) Farts, Burps, Smells, doesn't groom.
31) Are you still reading this>

How long must the list be?

* Click "Post Anonymously". Submit.

Re:Irony abounds.

[Anonymous Coward]

But it's not even an open letter. I though an open letter needed a forum for public discussion, the Internet equivalent of which is also known as a "forum", or a "talkback", or a "nuke", or more widely known, a "blog"... oh... or a link to it on /.

Re:Closed Letter

[mwooldri]

Dearest Darl... Thou hast a problem with ye English language? Then ye shalt readeth of the Bible of GPL until ye hearts bleed. As thou canst tell, I am using ye ancient version of ye English language, which hast been placed in ye public domaine many moons ago. Besides, hast thou hearest of ye King James Bible? Remindest ones of ye Ancient Unix. humbly your servant...

Re:Yep, the GPL is REALLY BAD!

[SmallFurryCreature]

1) The GPL kills small cute furry animals.

EEEK

Darl Channeling Nixon?

[MuParadigm]

He's obfuscating the issues on purpose. Notice how he never mentions IBM in the document, but mentions Red Hat over and over?

It's because he wants to associate the GPL with Red. In particular, with Red Commie Un-American Bastards.

Darl's got a real Nixonian / McCarthyite streak in him. He keeps claiming that the "silent majority" is on his side, which is, weirdly enough, what Nixon kept saying up until he resigned in '73.

Wealth Creation and OSS

[Bob9113]

I [netcraft.com] think [netcraft.com] some [netcraft.com] companies [netcraft.com] increase [netcraft.com] their [netcraft.com] ability [netcraft.com] to [netcraft.com] create [netcraft.com] wealth [netcraft.com] by [netcraft.com] using [netcraft.com] Free [netcraft.com] Software [netcraft.com].

That last one is Oxford. They run Debian. Cool.

Re:Ok then.

[Anonymous Coward]

Hmmm... So which SCO exec is going to get pushed out of a helicopter this time around?

Soo...

[Anonymous Coward]

5) Reciting the text of the GPL backwards will cause the appearance of the Anti-Christ and will initiate the apocalypse.

Y'know, that's not wholly untrue. I did that a few years back, when everybody thought Gore had won.

Soo... according to horror movie logic, you reading it forwards again will make GWB go away like a bad dream? Hurry, for the love of God! The world depends on you! /LarsWestergren

Re:Irony abounds.

[Anonymous Coward]

Disclaimer: I work in Public Relations.

I find the word "work" and phrase "Public Relations" to be inconsistant with each other.

I suggest you use the alternative statement, "I lie for money."

DARL IS THE BEST TROLL EVER.

[Dave_bsr]

-1, flamebait. Seriously...Darl is just asking for it! he's like the world's BEST TROLL EVER. No one else in the entire world has gotten this many geeks mad! Amazing.

Re:Top ten reaons why Darl is doing this

[mormop]

Back in the 11th Century, King Cnut (I jest not) a Dane who invaded england was told by a toadying advisor, that he was so powerful and wise that the very sea itself would turn back on his command. Cnut (being wiser than his advisor) said it wouldn't and decided to prove the point by sitting on the beach and ordering the sea to retreat with obvious "pant's filled with sand" consequences, thus proving that though Cnut was appointed by god, only the Big G himself had power over the forces of nature.

Picture the scene:

Darl McBride in his office, playing with his executive toy. Enter a junior member of the SCO board. "Darl your a Genius! That DrDOS thing was fucking inspired, I mean, your mind and knowledge of Intellectual Property law is so great that even Big Blue itself would pay you billions of dollars if you made a claim against them. I mean they would be so awe struck at your wisdom and legal genius that they wouldn't even check to see if what you were saying was true no matter how ridiculous your claims".

Bullshit said Darl, and to prove it...........

Re:Ok then.

[Soruk]

McBride, with any luck. In Antarctica. Amongst a bunch of angry, hungry penguins.

Re:Ok then.

[Blue Stone]

Yet it qualifies as news here.

I agree. This story definitely belongs in the "Entertainment" section.

Surely..

[Channard]

Surely 'Hungry, horny penguins?' It'd make for a great headline - 'McBride fuxed, snaxed by Tux.'

Re:Don't they......they don't.....

[Odin's Raven]

Should be enough to bury SCO, eh?

You're dealing with an entity that:

• Technically died a long time ago, but hasn't stopped moving
• Needs to suck the lifeforce out of other entities to ensure its own survival

You don't simply bury something like that. You need to cut off its head and put a stake through its heart first.

securing an insanity plea

[SQLz]

The letter serves one purpose. When Darl goes down for fraud he can pull out that letter and present it as proof he is insane.

Re:Closed Letter -- pedantic spell checking is fun

[Rinikusu]

me think'st thou hast too much fuckinth time on thine handsth.

Re:Irony abounds.

[Gulik]

whether he believes it or not isn't important... the people who "need" to believe this (from sco's point of view) are - in no order: ...
* his mom - so she's not so embarassed that she goes back to her maiden name

Which, I can only hope, is "McMaiden."

Re:Yep, the GPL is REALLY BAD!

[SLot]

You should have gone with the following:

Everything you think you know about the GPL is true. It is an evil, twisted devil-worshipper. It sacrifices kittens and babies, then dances naked, covered in their blood, around a bonfire, calling upon the great old ones to smite the blessed and raise the wicked to immortal supremacy on earth. Plus, your slut of a daughter gangbangs it and all the OSS/FSS friends on your dinner table, in exchange for crack cocaine. It hates puppies, flowers, apple pie, mom, and everything american, especially the president. But, most of all it hates you with a murderous passion you could barely understand with your limited intellect. Everything you feared about the GPL is true. Oh, and it knows where you live.

apologies to Brian at http://www.sighco.com

Re:An open letter TO Darl McBride

[scrytch]

Dear Mr Specter,

Your offer has been accepted. Due to leasing arrangements and other circumstances, the present location of SCO headquarters must be relocated. SCO's assets not written off to depreciation will be transferred to your location. We have procured a late-model hatchback station wagon rental for this purpose.

Additionally, all papers concerning SCO's financial liabilities to stockholders and pending litigation will be transferred to you. Please let us know whether you wish them transferred via cargo freight or whether we will need to arrange a contract with a trucking company for this purpose.

Regards,
Darl

Einstein would have been a trillionaire

[Anonymous Coward]

According to Darl: "The profit motive is the engine that ensures the progress of science." I suppose Uncle Albert was thinking of the trillions he would have earned developing the theories that underpin, among others, today's nuclear power plants and solar power cells (and yes, even WMD's).