SCO Calls GPL Unenforceable, Void 1186
wes33 writes "Groklaw has a link
to SCO's replies to IBM's amended complaints. Some
choice bits: '6th Affirmative Defense -
The GPL is unenforceable, void and/or voidable, and IBM's claims
based thereon, or related thereto, are barred. ... 7th Affirmative Defense - The GPL is selectively enforced by the Free Software Foundation
such that enforcement of the GPL by IBM or others is waived, estopped or otherwise barred as a matter of equity. ... 8th Affirmative Defense -
The GPL violates the U.S. Constitution, together with copyright, antitrust
and export control laws, and IBM's claims based theron, or related thereto, are barred.' Comments are pouring in ... not all of them
complimentary to SCO or its legal strategy." Considering that the GPL and the GNU project rely on and affirm the protections of copyright, this seems like a strange argument to pursue.
...THERE it is (Score:4, Funny)
I guess (Score:3, Funny)
So will it change from BSD is dead to... (Score:3, Funny)
Obligatory (Score:5, Funny)
8th Affirmative Defense: The GPL is Unconstitutional and invalid.
9th Affirmative Defense: ???
10th Affirmative Defense: Profit!
Violates The Constitution?? (Score:3, Funny)
Wow, now, I understand the legal "carpet bombing" theory, but COME ON NOW.
Then again, I'd like to "violate" certain folks at SCO, I'm sure they'd love a little man-meat...
WTF? (Score:3, Funny)
Comments (Score:4, Funny)
This
Re:I can't take much more of this (Score:2, Funny)
But what I want to know, is why we aren't teaching them a lesson they wont soon forget?
Proving freedom of speech (Score:5, Funny)
I agree! (Score:5, Funny)
Yes! I, too, feel that current copyright laws violate the U. S. Constitution! I'm glad somebody has finally come on-board with this, even if it is SCO.
Diagnosis (Score:2, Funny)
Homer: I've got the presciption for you, another hot beef injection!
OB Chewbacca Defense quote (Score:4, Funny)
Why would a Wookiee -- an eight foot tall Wookiee -- want to live on Endor with a bunch of two foot tall Ewoks? That does not make sense!
But more importantly, you have to ask yourself: what does that have to do with this case?
Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense!
Look at me, I'm a lawyer defending a major record company, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca. Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense. None of this makes sense.
And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberating and conjugating the Emancipation Proclamation... does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense.
If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.
in other news... (Score:4, Funny)
"Our field testing has proven very effective," says Ralph Synles, head of SCO R&D, "Subjects spend almost every waking moment in a projected fantasyland, and the way their hearts are racing, I would say they are high as fucking hell."
"Pink fuzzy secret code wonderful property tastes like intellectual NDA violations. Call my stock broker!" SCO's CEO, Daryl McBride, was quoted as saying, before giggling and waving around several blank sheets of printer paper.
They forgot one... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:WTF? (Score:4, Funny)
it's a shame.. (Score:3, Funny)
In more GPL news ... (Score:5, Funny)
Futhermore, high ranking army officers are also said to be frustrated by the GPL. "It is quite simply conter-productive in our efforts to find Saddam and to bring law and order to Iraq", said an officer, speaking under anonymity.
And finally, graffiti was seen on Redmond, WA train claiming, "GPL = French". Underneath was written, "it's '==' you insensitive clod".
Hopefully (Score:1, Funny)
Re:SHUT THE FUCK UP (Score:4, Funny)
Re:EFF (Score:5, Funny)
Considering the GPL is credited to GNU/Stallman, wouldn't that line therefore be transformed into:
"emacss a emacss the GPL?"
Re:So will it change from BSD is dead to... (Score:5, Funny)
-credits to the Simpsons on that one
Re:Maybe it would be a good thing (Score:3, Funny)
Re:SCOX ticker says it all (Score:4, Funny)
Launch has been made, nothing to do now but ride it out.
As a corollary this probably explains why Ralph Yarro is being refered to as "Betty" around the SCO offices and has little or nothing to do with his private life.
KFG
Re:Linux is an unauthorized version of UNIX? (Score:1, Funny)
Re:SCO is intercoursed either way (Score:3, Funny)
Judging by the way they read English documents and Legallese documents: They and their lawyers are clearly dyslexic.
They are Dog.
Open Source Supports Terrorism (Score:1, Funny)
Exactly. This scares businesses just like modern culture scares religious zealouts. It's something new that they can't control and don't understand so their first instinct is to bash it and quash it before it can spread. Besides, we all know who the real evil is behind the open source movement. Look at all the dirty bearded hippies and then cast your eyes halfway around the world at another group of scraggly bearded fellows. Open Source UNIX == Terrorism.
Re:SCO and DOS (Score:4, Funny)
Allow them the maximum use of their bandwidth.
This will allow them to discredit and incriminate themselves much more effectively.
Re:SCOX ticker says it all (Score:3, Funny)
Transcript of oral arguments (Score:2, Funny)
Curly: Yeah! Habius!
Mo: Shut up, ya moron, you're blowing our case!
Larry: Hey, what about the GPL?
Mo: I'll GPL you, wise guy!
Bonk! Ow! Smack! Smack! Smack!
Re:Linux is an unauthorized version of UNIX? (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Simplified Pleadings... (Score:5, Funny)
They're called "trials".
It gets even better than that. (Score:3, Funny)
Better than that, if they did enforce their terms on YOU, they would be selectively enforcing them and , and THATS NOT FAIR, THERFORE IT'S VOID BABY, YEA!
So on crack, they are.
The analysis is in. (Score:3, Funny)
M.O. comparative analysis, it has been determined that
Darl McBride [rr.com] and Billy Mays [atmospheric-violence.com] are one and the same.
They are both so extremely obnoxious and both make such outlandish claims and
look very much alike that they could only be the same person.
Re:This is a good thing. (Score:3, Funny)
Michael
No! Not too funny - NOT FUNNY ENOUGH! (Score:3, Funny)
Nope..
While reading the Groklaw article, I finally figured out what SCO is trying to do with this submission..
They're trying to kill IBM's lawyers!
We've all seen the Monty Python sketch, where the Allies use the world's funniest joke to kill the Axis forces - this is SCO's attempt to do the same thing to IBM's lawyers!
The problem is, of course, that while it is side-splittingly funny, it's not funny enough to cause someone to die laughing.
Re:Can you say, "Pump and Dump"? (Score:5, Funny)
* Administrative needs of CFO and other executives
Buys Crack.
* Quarterly budget reports
Balances crack budget.
* Travel Arrangements
What contries do not have extradition treaties with the US.
* Organizing meetings and phone conferences
Supervisor of SCO koolaid distribution.
* Supply inventory
Do not run out of crack.
* General office responsibilities
There is no code but SCO's, and Darl is our prophet.
* Records minutes of various meetings
Must be willing to break federal wiretap laws
* Partner Program database coordination
Who can we steal from today?
* Answer investor questions regarding Stock performance
Answers questions like: why are SCO execs selling all there stock?
* Packaging of financial corporate communications with the investment community
Bill, It's SCO, Send more money.
* Helps prepare written investor communications and plan investor/analyst small-group private and large-group meetings
Look at the monkey.
* Handles telephone inquiries from analysts and investors
Yes, We invented Linux.
* Oversees scheduling and coverage of front desk
Must qualify as expert with no less than 3 separate small arms, riot control experience preferred.
Must be the mushrooms... (Score:2, Funny)
Bah.
OK, fine. (Score:3, Funny)
In other news... (Score:3, Funny)
Easy Way to keep your acronyms straight... (Score:4, Funny)
If SCO Were A Person... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Not a bad reply but... (Score:3, Funny)
It's worth a laugh, so I've posted it below:
Thank you for your sending your message.
It is unfortunate we can not make joint market for both products.
You may understand SCO position from following URL:
http://www.sco.com/scosource/
It may not be good explanation for current SCO's action, but like someone
would took your technologies, such as some of your xxxx xxxx platform,
and included into some software under GPL, then how your company
would do. SCO protects SCO's assets of UNIX technologies which SCO owns
now, and some of the technologies under UNIX has been included into Linux
OS under GPL, so SCO is fighting to recover this situation. Though in
Japanese, you can see SCO's Executives interview with Nikkei Electronics on
this issue at Nikkei Electronics 10-13-2003 issue Cover Story "SCO's Linux
Shock".
I hope you can understand correctly and come back again with us.
Our SCO UnixWare product is very reliable and stable UNIX operating system
for IA-32 platform and easy port from Sun/Solaris platform.
And SCO Authentication product provides the single login system over
Sun/Solaris UNIX, IBM AIX, HP-UX, SCO UNIX, and RedHat Linux working with
Microsoft Windows 2000/2003 Active Directory.
Please visit our SCO Japan web as well at www.jp.sco.com for more
information about SCO's products and services in Japan.
Hmmm... "like someone would took your technologies, such as some of your xxxx xxxx platform, and included into some software under GPL, then how your company would do."
Well, I'm sure my company would first be very careful indeed to see whether or not "our" technologies were in fact ours before accusing anybody.
As for "understanding correctly and coming back to SCO" - sorry guys, but YOU FAIL IT!!1!!!
Re:Can you say, "Pump and Dump"? (Score:5, Funny)
a) Britany ain't dead
b) IBM didn't kill her
c) SCO ain't intitled to collect even if a and b weren't the case
You don't need to be a lawyer. There is no "worst case" because SCO has no case.
If SCO didn't exist we'd have to invent them. (Score:5, Funny)
And how nice that SCO is being an obvious pack of assholes about the whole thing. This puts the defenders of the GPL in a much better situation than if they had been reasonable.
You'll recall how, when the Forces of Law'nOrder try to set a precedent confirming the enforcability of some new law (especially if it's constitutionality is questionable), they'll go after the worst scumbag they can find first. (Like going after child pornographers when trying out the latest restriction on the free press.) Once they get the precedent set, they can then use it to club anybody else who publishes something they don't like.
SCO, by taking on the entire world and insulting the intelligence of the judges who will be handling the case with a stack of obviously bogus claims, has voluntarily put itself in a position with respect to the GPL of the child pornographer picked by a prosecutor to try out a new censorship law. VERY convenient for the GPL side.
This reminds me of a saying from the heyday of usenet news political discussion/debate groups. Often there would be a regular poster on one side who would trot out every tired, repeatedly disproved, position of that side of the argument. He could never be convinced to change his position. But he'd make a DANDY foil for presenting the counter-arguments, for the edification of thousands of neo-lurkers who hadn't yet heard them. Then, a few weeks later, once a new crop of newbies had gathered and/or another news item made the subject front-page once more, he'd rehash them AGAIN. How convenient!
After a few iterations some of the posters would get bored or annoyed with him and start asking how he could be discouraged (or kicked off, if the group was moderated). Then the old hands would point out how CONVENIENT it was to have someone from the "other side" to periodically hoist the strawmen and give the rest of us an opportunity for a bonfire.
SO convenient, that it would often be said that "If [whomever] didn't exist we'd have to invent him.", i.e. we'd have to plant a shill in the crowd to do the same function (but less believably, because someone who actually believes the opposite position won't get the rhetoric quite right.)
Of course you'd never know if [whomever] actually WAS a shill - a particularly convincing one. (And that uncertainty also helped. It implied that if he WAS a shill, he'd only be raising arguments that were defective. So simply by raising one of "his side's" arguments he discredited it. B-)
SCO has been so PERFECT in this role that the old saw applies.
If the GPL can't handle a legal challenge, it's better to find that out sooner rather than later.
SCo has been so perfect for our side that it's almost enough to make you wonder if SCO *IS* a shill.
In Other News... (Score:3, Funny)
Oh, the reciept? *pats pockets* Let's not get bogged down in trifling details...
Re:Here's what you were saying... (Score:5, Funny)
Communism: The other way around.
Re:This is totally irrelivant, but: (Score:3, Funny)
Maybe in a years time we will see that this whole SCO ordeal is a cleverly orchestrated comedy documentary...
See this link for examples - http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B000066N
Re:Can you say, "Pump and Dump"? (Score:2, Funny)
yo, keep dat old jew away from my bling-bling.
SCO (Score:2, Funny)
It's the only way to be sure......
Re:Can you say, "Pump and Dump"? (Score:3, Funny)
Your post reminds me of this classic:
"Your honor, I object to this testimony on the grounds that it makes my client look guilty."
-Yep, it's offtopic; no, I don't know where it originated (Saturday Night Live?); but I chuckle every time it runs through my head.