How To Profit From Telemarketing 329
jsprat writes: "From the Seattle PI: A man gets an automated message from a telemarketer. He complains. Two weeks later, he gets a check and an apology! In the article, another man is mentioned who claims to have collected $2650 dollars over the last year for illegal spam, faxes and automated calls. Another weapon to fight these clowns?" What's your personal cash-won record?
Ironically.... (Score:3, Funny)
045Ax 65384... CORE DUMP..... (Score:2, Funny)
In case you aren't aware there aren't really any people posting on slashdot - this is all one gigantic IRC bot specifically designed to make you believe that you are part of a community. You (yes - *you* ) are talking to a very clever computer program.
Well, sorry if we confused you, and hey thanks anyway. (Oh, yes and because you are the only reader our logs show that you have several 'karma accounts' and a number of 'troll' accounts - you never fooled anyone.
Even your emails to Taco were ironic - you didnt know, but Taco is actually a QuickBasic program on an old XT!
Thanks for reading and posting.
Over, and out.
Woah! Hey relax - its a joke (I've seen the Matrix too many times)
My personal cash-won record? (Score:5, Funny)
I hate to brag, Timothy, but I think you're being just a little short-sighted about this.
Never underestimate . . . (Score:2, Funny)
I get about 9 to 10 spam emails a day (Score:2, Funny)
Gotta try this: (Score:2, Funny)
human: Sure!
It's simple, all you have to do is listen to this message, follow a simple procedure and BOOM! its money in your pocket
human:
Simply send 10 dollars to the following address, or leave us your credit card details, and we'll send you all the information you need to complain about us! Yes, it is that simple!
Would you like to be as happy as me? (Score:3, Funny)
Well, I work for RIAA (Score:5, Funny)
I actually like telemarketers.... (Score:1, Funny)
Well I'm no lawyer, (Score:5, Funny)
For example, just last Tuesday I got $574 dollars and a $200 Rolex from a salesman who failed to notice the "no solicitors" sign on my front gate. He said he'd sue for excessive force and I said he's welcome to have his other eye blacked out too, and to get the fuck out of my house before I take that spiffy suit to go with my new rolex.
Must be new to the area.
Destroying the telemarketing industry. (Score:5, Funny)
Telemarketers (Score:4, Funny)
I won 3500 and am suing a few others for 5x that (Score:5, Funny)
The deal is that anything sent to my business domain name is for business (in or out). I clearly have a statement at the bottom of the site that states that unsolicited email will result in an hourly charge, with a two hour minimum for my services and time. The judges here crack up when they see that, but they have yet to rule against me. I just don't do it enough to be annoying to them.
Specifically, I have filters with auto responders in place stating that the email was unsolicited and that I reserve the right to bill them for time and expenses per my companies standard policy. My email details that they should remove me from their list and immediately disclose the source from which they acquired my private email (which is NOT listed on the site or given out freely on the net). If they don't respond, fine, if they respond negatively or I recieve email from them again unsolicited, I sue. If they actually hand over their source for the mail address (a few have), I sue that company for disclosing my private email and information without permission (that suit is automatic by the way in NJ).
Most just remove me and don't send any more mail, a few are irate and spam me some more or repsond directly in a derisive way (they get sued), a couple have given me their sources and remove me from the list, and a few even apologize (usually the larger, more legitimate outfits).
So far I have spent about four hours in court (I only make 175-200 an hour, so I profited here) and about six hours on the net or working towards filtering and responding. I laugh my ass off at the ireate repsonses, and even more when I have their bank acount frozen until they pay their legal obligation to me settled by default in small claims court.
heh (Score:4, Funny)
Telemarketing his highly profitable. I *can* make 2000 dollars
a week, working from home, and being my own boss.
Even a wyoming highschool dropout can do this [411diet.net]
If things go as planned, I will retire at the tender age of 35, married to a russian
woman, and grow my penis upto 25".
--
Boring! Try having more fun with 'em :-) (Score:3, Funny)
When you know it is a telemarketer, just set the phone next to any of the following for an extended period of time.
Nahhh.... too easy
You should piss about with them insted. eg
Them: Selling double-glassing (very common in UK)
You: Sorry mate, my house dosnt have any windows (over time, tell em you live in a nuclear bunker or something)
Them: "I'm carrying out a survay for..."
You: HAHA.... so am I !!! What are the chances of that!!!
Just keep 'em on the line and wind them up for as long as possable until they tell you to fuck off and slam the phone down! :-)
The other alternative is yor very own free porn chatline. Just talk dirty for a bit and see how long it takes 'em to hang up
Re:Destroying the telemarketing industry. (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Telemarketers have evolved... (Score:2, Funny)
Irony (Score:3, Funny)
Simple Solution and you don't have to sue (Score:2, Funny)
Simply answer the phone, get the pitch, request the address and phone number of the company.
Then, mail them a bill.
Once the bill is mailed, wait two weeks and file a lawsuit suing the company for not meeting a contractual agreement. Keep a copy of the ad handy and you will win in court.
I actually heard about a friend who did this and won. He did it quite often, he got quite a bit of money the first year. Now, he rarely ever gets calls.
Might be worth a try.