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SCO's Lawsuit Gets Even Crazier
Posted by
kdawson
on Tue Jul 15, 2008 03:25 PM
from the if-such-were-possible dept.
from the if-such-were-possible dept.
I Don't Believe in Imaginary Property writes "With SCO in Chapter 11 bankruptcy and there being little to read other than status reports and the boring financial details of how the company is wasting its last few dollars, one could be excused for thinking the SCO lawsuits had lost their zip. But things just got a bit more interesting. Jonathan Lee Riches has asked the court to take over. Yes, the man also known as inmate #40948-018 is now bringing his legal experience to the table, having previously filed pro se lawsuits against such entities as Michael Vick, Michael Jordan, Mickey Mantle, the Lincoln Memorial, the Thirteen Tribes of Israel, 'Various Buddhist Monks,' Mein Kampf, Denny's, George W. Bush, the Soviet Gulag Archipelago, Bellevue Hospital, Iran's Evin Prison, Auschwitz, and Plato. In his hand-written pro se motion (PDF), he asks to intervene as Plaintiff pursuant to FRCP 24(a)(2). As best anyone can read the motion, it appears that he offered Novell some 'royalty payments' and they refused them, so he wants to protect his UnixWare rights. He also claims to have proof of SCO's claims, but he wants take over part of the case via FRCP 24 because SCO isn't competent, and allegedly he could do a better job. To be fair, between him and Darl, it's something of a toss-up."
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Submission: SCO's Lawsuit Gets Even Crazier by Anonymous Coward
[+]
News: Final Judgment — SCO Loses, Owes $3,506,526 265 comments
Xenographic writes "SCO has finally lost to Novell, now that Judge Kimball has entered final judgment against SCO. Of course, this is SCO we're talking about. There's still the litigation in bankruptcy court, which allowed this case to resume so that they could figure out just how much SCO owes, which is $3,506,526, if I calculated the interest properly, $625,486.90 of which will go into a constructive trust. And then there's the possibility that SCO could seek to have the judgment overturned in the appeals courts, or even the Supreme Court when that fails. Of course, they need money to do that and they don't really have much of that any more. Remember how Enderle, O'Gara and company told us that SCO was sure to win? I wonder how many people have emailed them to say, 'I told you so.'"
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To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:5, Funny)
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:5, Funny)
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:4, Funny)
Pfff I want to sue "Mein Kampf", I mean, how many times do you get to sue an inanimate object? (To be fair, the Lincoln Memorial probably has a staff..)
Parent
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:5, Informative)
He's also sued the Magna Carta. ;) I actually read about him when he triggered one of my Google News Alerts by suing Steve Fambro [greentechmedia.com], founder of Aptera Motors, for not giving him a long-sleeved shirt to stay warm with. Aptera [daughtersoftiresias.org] is the company that's making the two hyper-efficient spaceship-like [greentechmedia.com] three wheelers: the $27k, 120-mile range Aptera Typ-1e electric car and the $30k Aptera Typ-1h plug-in hybrid.
Parent
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:5, Funny)
Wow, turns out some one tried to sue themselves for getting arrested. [lawsuit.no] >_
Parent
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:4, Funny)
very low quality is a complement. I'm amazed people haven't died from eating that food.
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Denny's is edible, the same as IHOP (international house of prostitution - aka watch out for the cottage cheese discharges)
There's something in chicago that's open 24 hours thats somewhat of an Ed Debevics equivalent, that is obviously more expensive (city tax) but legitimately a worthy eat...wish I remembered the name.
Of course, any restaurant thats open after midnight the first response is that "your mileage may vary" as every place at that point is likely some form of a risk to eat at.
Re:To be fair, who among you HASNT wanted to sue (Score:4, Funny)
* WARNING: Consuming raw, undercooked food, or food from Denny's may increase your risk of food-borne illness.
Parent
Hmm.. (Score:5, Funny)
To be fair, between him and Darl, it's something of a toss-up."
"Toss up"? You got that right.
Translation of PDF (Score:5, Insightful)
Re: (Score:2)
My favorite JLR quote:
"Philip Woolston and Apple Computers sexually assaulted me in my dreams and not in real life, I can't sue a dream."
Re:Translation of PDF (Score:5, Insightful)
Parent
Re:Translation of PDF (Score:4, Insightful)
Parent
Re:Translation of PDF (Score:5, Interesting)
The primary idea would be that you would then dispense entirely with the insanity plea, regard ALL who are convicted as needing some mental health care, and split the time accordingly. This means that all who actually do need treatment get it, and those who don't get a thorough health check, so nobody would lose. This would also eliminate the usual problem of the prosecution and the defense hiring mental health "experts" that look for what they want to see, and the whole problem of 'criminal insanity'. Such a concept would have no meaning, if all insanity gets treated and no insanity is punished. You'd have to be extremely careful to keep it to genuine help rather than control, but I don't see that as an impossibility.
The secondary aspect is that if some people get the mental health checks first, you might reduce prison violence and prison ganglands. If these attitudes can be attacked effectively, it has to be outside an environment they think they can rule. There is something macho to those guys about being in prison, it's even a medal of honor to some. I don't think they'd get quite that machismo kick out of being in a padded room with doctors who are going to utterly ignore their ravings.
Of course, this means you would need to build highly secure mental homes capable of handling three or four million people, have sufficient medical facilities in each to test and treat as necessary, and sufficient experts in the field to actually handle the volume of work. I'm not sure what 9.4T MRI scanners cost these days, but you really need to get to that resolution to diagnose anything other than the most coarse-grained of stuff. Nor do I know how much the highest resolution CAT, PET, fMRI and EEG systems cost. However, I don't imagine the full works for every major population center would cost more than a few tens of trillions of dollars in total. A hundred trillion at the outside. Not sure the return would come close to that, which is a pain, but it might finally kill the Wild West attitude towards justice that is found in so many countries, and that would be a Good Thing at almost any price.
The biggest drawback to this speculation is that quite possibly I'm the only one on the planet who thinks along these lines.
Parent
Re:Translation of PDF (Score:4, Funny)
What was that about Denny's again?
Parent
Re:Translation of PDF (Score:5, Funny)
Translation of this story: "Hey, let's laugh at that mentally ill person!"
If I was stuck in jail for 10 years, I'd be doing the same thing -- sucking as MUCH money out of the system as possible, just for something to do. Plus they might let him out to shut him up.
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
Giving them access to the courts is done on purpose, to prevent excesses in the prison system. (Not that this is particularly effective, but that's the the
Hey, hey, not so fast... (Score:3, Funny)
Darl may be mentally ill, but I can't be the only one withholding judgement on his status as a member of the human race until someone pays for independent review.
Of course, the very job of auditing Darl for evidence of humanity brings to mind the joke about lawyers v. labrats ('there are some things even a rat won't do').
Oh, you meant the cellmate?... um, Nevermind... </emily>
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:Translation of PDF (Score:5, Funny)
Parent
Shawshank (Score:5, Funny)
Oh wait - I'm failing to separate fact from fiction...
Oh wait...
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Cellmates (Score:5, Funny)
I mean, it's the next logical step in this case, isn't it?
Re:Cellmates (Score:4, Funny)
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Darl: Mandrake, do you realize that flouridation of keyboards is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous Linux plot that we have yet to face? ... I cannot sit back and allow Linux infiltration, Linux indoctrination, Linux subversion, and the international Linux conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.
That's fun... (Score:2)
...ya just can't buy.
Fat chance. (Score:5, Funny)
Compared to SCO, this guy's lawsuit actually has a chance of succeeding.
don't forget... (Score:2, Funny)
Toss up? (Score:3, Funny)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
So which one's going to be getting their salad tossed [urbandictionary.com], and which one's the eater? Or is it going to be a mutual thing?
Insane, but knowlegable (Score:4, Insightful)
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Granted the guy has totally went insane in prison
He's insane like Monty Python is insane. Totally insane is when you have to wear depends and take Thorazine shots daily. You shouldn't call things bricked that are salvageable. Boredom will make you do strange things.
Plato's reponse (Score:5, Insightful)
IANAMP (Score:5, Interesting)
I am not a medical professional, but it sure seems that Jonathan Lee Riches is acting in ways that may be medically insane. The US Justice system doesn't exactly have a good track record when dealing with mental illness.
If he is ill, I hope he gets treatment.
Goodness Gracious, Great Gobs of Dough! (Score:4, Interesting)
That's 211 septillion, 429 sextillion, 399 quintillion dollars. To compare, the world's GDP (as of 2006) was $65.95 trillion. So the guy wanted over 3.2 TRILLION percent of the world's GDP.
The guy's either a certified loon or someone trying to pass himself off as one. And these two small quotes are just two drops in the loony bucket. I hate to say it, but even Darl McBride's most fantastic quotes were closer to reality that this guy's quotes. Even though Darl didn't have anywhere near the evidence to back his claims, they were within the general realm of possibility. Larry King stealing this guy's identity to buy ziploc bags and passing them on to the CIA to "microwave test" his DNA? That makes Iraq's old Information Minister look like he was telling the complete truth.
Re:Goodness Gracious, Great Gobs of Dough! (Score:4, Informative)
And how is that crazier than the RIAA wanting $150,000.00 for each song "illegally shared" to compensate them for their "losses" - which also, using their figures for "song piracy", also works out to more than all the money in the world?
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
The guy's either a certified loon or someone trying to pass himself off as one.
Honestly? His claims sound a lot like the religious tomes of Scientology.
Maybe he's bored, or waiting for the mother ship?
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
That's 211 septillion, 429 sextillion, 399 quintillion dollars. To compare, the world's GDP (as of 2006) was $65.95 trillion. So the guy wanted over 3.2 TRILLION percent of the world's GDP.
Geeze, why not just go all the way and ask for "infinity U.S. dollars, in non-sequential bills"
Tag request (Score:3, Funny)
Daryl won (Score:4, Insightful)
The difference between this guy and Daryl is that Daryl won. No, he didn't win the lawsuits, but that's a small detail. He walked away from it all a rich man. He won. With our legal system, it is quite easy to win a suit and come away having lost money big time. It is also possible to loose a suit, while getting rich in the process, although that's not so easy a trick to pull. Daryl managed. I'm not at all sure Daryl is stupid. Crooked - yes; stupid - not so clear at all.
JLR, on the other hand, is in prison.
Re:Daryl won (Score:4, Funny)
I aym iyn fulyl agreemenyt wityh yoyu.
Parent
699 trillion trillion of AWESOME you mean (Score:3, Funny)
Fucking Plato that rat bastid.
Darl's next career (Score:3, Funny)
Playing the part of the Black Knight in Monty Python's Search for the Holy Grail.
"None shall pass!"
How did this not make TFA (Score:3, Funny)
Really worth reading the Justia link in groklaw:
http://news.justia.com/cases/jonathan-lee-riches/ [justia.com]
This might be my favorite
Plaintiff sued the Jena 6 for "Loss of My White Rights" and sought $100 million in white gold and the White House. Plaintiff alleged that defendants hung a white noose in his cell at FCI Willaimsburg, told the FCI Williamsburg dentists not to fix his white fillings, fed him tainted White Castle hamburgers, turn his cell mate into Snow White, called him the white Suge Knight, burnt him with Great Whites pyrotechnics, made him suffer whiteouts, gave him white phosphorus, subjected him to low white blood cell counts, and that Vanna White won't write. Defendants also allegedly turned plaintiff into a white collar criminal and sent Whitehouse prosecutors after his white skin.
This guy is definitely hilarious and not crazy.
Re:SCO isn't competent? Ya think? (Score:5, Interesting)
This guy is an amazing loon. Seriously, he makes Jack Thompson look sane.
From Washington Post [washingtonpost.com] (as linked in above summary):
Can't find words..
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
Are we sure he isn't also this guy [timecube.com]?
Ahh, the world would be a much more boring place without a few raving lunatics about.
Re:SCO isn't competent? Ya think? (Score:5, Funny)
numerous judges have thrown his cases out, one referred to his case as 'farsical'
Wow, this nut writes his cases in Persian?
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)