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Oops, Dave Barry Does It Again
Posted by
timothy
on Sun Oct 05, 2003 08:50 AM
from the free-nights-and-weekends dept.
from the free-nights-and-weekends dept.
agdv writes "After the success of his first article providing the phone number of the American Teleservices Association, and the ensuing reaction by said organization, columnist Dave Barry attacks again, providing the ATA's new phone number. Read all about it! (the number is 317-816-9336, long distance charges may apply)."
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The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:4, Informative)
Parent
Re:The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:4, Informative)
ATA Board of Directors [ataconnect.org] (Google Cache [216.239.59.104])
ATA Staff [ataconnect.org] (Google Cache [216.239.59.104])
Parent
Re:The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:5, Funny)
Google Phone Book
I cannot vouch for the accuracy of this information!
Someone please doublecheck!
Thomas Rocca, Kennesaw, GA [google.com]
Andrew Miller, Omaha, NE [google.com]
Mark WIlliams, Wilmington, DE [google.com]
Parent
Re:The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:5, Insightful)
Parent
Re:The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:5, Insightful)
Parent
Re:The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:5, Informative)
Parent
Re:The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:5, Funny)
When he gets door-to-door salesmen, he invites them in and says, "Man, I'm glad you dropped by! I've had a tough time lately. I got laid off, my wife left me, and, you know, I just need someone to talk to." He says that it takes about 30 seconds and they're eager to leave.
Parent
Re:The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:5, Funny)
TELEMARKETER: So, sir, can I send you the free one month trail of You're A Sucker magazine, with no obligation for 30 days, and after that a cost of only $89.99 a year?
RECORDING: Uh-huh.
TELEMARKETER: That's wonderful! Can I confirm that your address is %%ADDRESSS%%?
RECORDING: Uh-huh.
TELEMARKETER: Thank you. Now would you like to receive a 10% discount by paying for your first year right now over the phone?
RECORDING: (silence)
TELEMARKETER: Or would you like to receive a bill for the full $89.99 after 30 days?
RECORDING: Uh-huh.
Maybe a better option would be a "Hmmm...." every so often. Maybe even better would, with the help of some friends/babies, go something like:
"Hello?....Hi....Hey listen the baby is screaming right now, can you hold on for a second?....Ok now what were you saying?....No, wait, I forgot, who are you calling for again?....Oh there is somebody at the door, can you hold on for another second?...."
and repeat ad nauseum (and remember that the telemarketers would probably have a much stronger stomach for that stuff that you realize...)
Parent
Re:The association? Why not some home numbers? (Score:5, Funny)
They never came back to my street.
Parent
Possible Home Numbers for ATA board members (Score:5, Informative)
Chairmain
Thomas Rocca
1014 Ector Dr Nw
Kennesaw, GA 30152
(770) 429 - 1956
Vice-Chairman
Lisa Defalco (Business Number)
TPG Telemanagement Inc
301 Oxford Valley Road, Morrisville, PA 19067
(215) 369-0979
I'll leave the lookups of the rest as an exercise for the reader:
Parent
Oh the irony! (Score:5, Funny)
"This number has Privacy Director and does not accept caller ID blocked calls."
I wonder why.
Parent
Re:Oh the irony! (Score:5, Interesting)
Thier usual tactic is to use the phone number of the Portland Police or Fire Department or to use my phone number as the spoof when calling me.
Parent
Re:Oh the irony! (Score:5, Insightful)
Parent
Re:Oh the irony! (Score:5, Funny)
Most of the telemarketing calls I get are from them asking if I want to donate for whatever fundraiser they're doing this month.
Parent
Re:Prepaid calling card (Score:5, Funny)
You probably won't get through, but you'll burn their time nonetheless.
Parent
I'd call and say... (Score:5, Funny)
I'd call and say,
"Please hold for an important message..."
I Agree with his work... (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:I Agree with his work... (Score:5, Interesting)
It reminds me of a friend that worked for US Airways. Her job? "I overbook flights." That always got an interesting reaction from people, although none that I saw were actually nasty.
--RJ
Parent
Re:I Agree with his work... (Score:5, Funny)
Who is Darl McBride, CEO of SCO Group? (SCOX)
I'll take assholes for $400 please.
Parent
Re:I Agree with his work... (Score:5, Interesting)
I don't know exactly how this works, but if you once slip up and do something like this, have you blown it for good? How far can the business relationship clause be taken? I think there should be a way to "reset" your do-not-call status in some way, essentially saying that you wish to have all current "business relationships" to be considered dissolved, and under no circumstances wish to receive solicitations from any company. Because once your name gets into the "business relationship grapevine," can you say "do not call me again" fast enough to keep your number from spreading like the latest royal family gossip?
Parent
Not just a new number.. (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Not just a new number.. (Score:5, Informative)
So, click here [ataconnect.org]
Parent
taking the high road (Score:5, Funny)
From the article:
And I am, frankly, tempted to reveal to you here that the American Teleservices Association (www.ataconnect.org/) seems to have a phone line working (at least for now) at 317-816-9336.
Whew! That was close. We wouldn't want Mr. Barry to sully his relationship with the ATA by posting such scandalous info. Kudos to you, sir, for your strenuous efforts to maintain some level of decorum!
However, I have no such relationship...
American Teleservices Association 317-816-9336
American Teleservices Association 317-816-9336
American Teleservices Association 317-816-9336
American Teleservices Association 317-816-9336
American Teleservices Association 317-816-9336
Have a nice day!
Re:*67 is your friend (Score:5, Informative)
No, the reason why is because people with 800 numbers usually also make use of ANI, or Automatic Number Identification. This takes place at a lower level than CID and so cannot be blocked.
Parent
Note to self (Score:5, Funny)
- Anonymously tip off Dave Barry, telling him my number is an ATA number
- Wait for Dave Barry to post my number on the innurnet
- profit
Re:Note to self (Score:5, Interesting)
This is a surprisingly change over a lot of people punditing about world events, who's "research" seems to consist of skimming over one biased source of news like CNN and then misinterpreting that to fit their biases even more. It's almost a pity Dave Barry is a humor columnist in a way.
Parent
Beating dead horses. (Score:5, Insightful)
Firstly, it's Sunday in US. Chances are no one is there. By tomorrow, it'll drop off the first page (although I realize Barry has his followers)
Secondly, it's not a toll-free number. You have to pay long-distance charges, hence there is no actual damage done to the association people might want to annoy.
Can we let it go? The laws are fucked up. How about publishing the numbers of those congressmen who voted against DNC list? I don't see what this campaign is going to accomplish. Go after the gatekeeper.
Re:Beating dead horses. (Score:5, Informative)
Voice mail, as was mentioned in TFA you didn't R.
"You have to pay long-distance charges, hence there is no actual damage done to the association people might want to annoy."
Wasted man-hours.
"Can we let it go?"
If they can't, why should we?
"How about publishing the numbers of those congressmen who voted against DNC list?"
- Rob Bishop (R-UT)
- Washington, DC Office: 202-225-0453
- Ogden, Utah Office: 801-625-0107
- Tim Ryan (D-OH)
- Washington, DC Office: 202-225-5261
- Warren, Ohio Office: 330-373-0074
- Youngstown, Ohio Office: 330/740-0193
- Lee Terry (R-NE)
- Washington, DC Office: 202-225-4155
- Omaha, Nebraska Office: 402-397-9944
- Jeff Flake (R-AZ)
- Washington, DC Office: 202-225-2635
- Mesa, Arizona Office: 480-833-0092
- Ted Strickland (D-OH)
- Washington, DC Office: 202-225-5705
- Marietta, Ohio Office: 740-376-0868
- Wheelersburg, Ohio Office: 740-574-2676
- Boardman, Ohio Office: 330-965-4220
- Martins Ferry, Ohio Office: 740-633-2275
- Ron Paul (R-TX)
- Washington, DC Office: 202-225-2831
- Freeport, Texas Office: 979-230-0000
- Victoria, Texas Office: 361-576-1231
- Western District (14) Office: 512-753-5553
- Tom Tancredo (R-CO)
- Washington, DC Office: 202-225-7882
- Centennial, Colorado Office: 720-283-9772
When complaining, refer to House Resolution 395 (Do-Not-Call Implementation Act), which they saw fit to vote against on 12 February 2003 at 5:17 PM.Parent
Busy allready (Score:5, Funny)
Opt-In List ? (Score:5, Insightful)
Btw, Kudos to Dave!!!
- Jalil Vaidya
Busy.... (Score:5, Funny)
Busy *Update* (Score:5, Informative)
Listen to the message, go through the menu, hit 1 to access other mailboxes or you can use the company directory (Hint [216.239.59.104] Hint [216.239.59.104]) to leave messages for all your favorite ATA associates!
I believe the mailboxes are all 3 digit numbers, the number Dave Berry Posted is mailbox #104.
Parent
UK (Score:5, Interesting)
Using "free speech" rights to quash the list in America is, in my opinion, an abuse of the constitution. Mind you, it's not the first time it's been mangled and abused for the benefit of some interested party.
telemarketers on cnn (Score:5, Interesting)
In a later discussion on the same show someone pulled out the lame-sounding but apt question - should stealing cars be legal just because it puts people out of work if it's illegal?. Some dufus responded, saying it was an invalid argument since stealing cars is illegal. Finish the thought and you've got "...stealing cars is illegal and calling people who don't want to be called is legal". So the dufus had a rather circular argument - it should be legal because it's legal. I was rather annoyed that nobody called him on it.
Anyway, it's fun to watch this one from the sidelines. I haven't had a landline in 3 years.
Beyond personal agendas (Score:5, Insightful)
The politicians are trying, no matter what the consequences are to others, to react to popular demand (not a terrible thing) but to defend their right to make calls. (The "unconstitutional" argument is that charities, churches, and politicians can still call, but businesses can't.)
But we can be part of the problem, too. Not in demanding to eat dinner, or work from home, uninterrupted; that's fair. On the other hand, when we take out our frustration on the underpaid guys on the other end of the line -- instead of politely saying, "please put me on your company's do-not-call list, have a nice day" -- then we, too, are pursuing our agendas no matter what the consequences are to others.
And the next time you get a call, be as angry as you want at the caller's employer, but remember: you're only one layoff and twelve months of unemployment away from the person calling you.
A great deterant... (Score:5, Funny)
Another would be for the US to declare war on Telemarketing. Why? well, when ever GWB has a speech, guess what happens? the phone rings. When the phone rings, GWB loses his "connection with the American public". If you get rid of the telemarketers, you get a loyal listening audience
Could you imagine the speech?
"My fellow Americans, our country is under attack by spam, telemarketing and faxes. This group constitutes a Triangle of Trash. We must unit as a people to purge this scourge from this great nation of ours. Countries who current allow these communication terrorists to operate in their country have to make a decision, they are either with us or against us."
Toll-free number for ATA's legislative branch (Score:5, Informative)
"The number Dave Barry printed is now disconnected. And of course it is illegal as well as wrong to make prank phone calls. The law stands firm against the kinds of jokes played by 9 year-old kids!
But surely it's a fair use of free speech to call the ATA's legislative branch, whose toll-free number is listed on their contact page as (866) 500-4272, and urge them to lobby for better Do Not Call laws."
Surely.
ATA response (Score:5, Interesting)
Re: technical /. response (Score:5, Informative)
But with a normal number (1-317-ppp-nnnn), it is possible to block your number. Use calling ID suppression (*67 or whatever your CLASS activation code is) before dialing this number, so they can't claim "prior business relationship".
the AC
[1] Its possible to make calls without a traceable ID, but its difficult and requires an SS7 [openss7.org] connection
Parent
Here's more food for the dialers (Score:5, Informative)
I am sure they want to talk to people, as lonely as they must be.
Let's start from the top? I'll start from the top myself, and I'll have my fax machine start from the bottom.
True Tales of Telemarketing (Score:5, Interesting)
You may have seen a gizmo called a "TeleZapper" advertised on late-night TV, which purports to scare telemarketers away. Understanding its operation requires just a little familiarity with telemarketing technology, which I'll attempt to distill here: the telemarketing firm has a system called an "autodialer" which works sequentially through a list of phone numbers in a marketing database. After dialing a number, the system listens for one of three things: a person's voice, in which case the system then either plays a prerecorded sales pitch or connects an unfortunate person working as an automaton to deliver an "interactive" sales pitch (this is why sometimes you answer your phone and get a pause followed by a telemarketer asking "Hello?" even though you're the one answering the phone); a fax tone, in which case the system might either deliver a fax advertisement, or remove the phone number from the database and move on to the next in the list; or it might hear what's called a "SIT tone," which is that series of three ascending beeps you hear when you've dialed a disconnected number...such numbers are of course of no value to the telemarketing firm, so upon hearing this, the system will delete the number from the database and move on. What the TeleZapper does is intercept incoming calls, play a SIT tone, then (if they don't disconnect, as an autodialer would) put the call through to your actual telephone. I've heard one can achieve much of the same effect simply by putting the SIT tone at the start of their answering machine message...I had a WAV file of the tone on my computer somewhere, and just never got around to doing that.
Anyway, with the bulk of the techno-babble out of the way...
It was around noon on a Saturday that I received one of those delightful prerecorded sales calls. But this one was different. Normally, telemarketers block their phone number from Caller ID, so if one subscribes to that service they'll only see "Unknown" when such a call arrives. For some reason, this one didn't...my phone displayed the number from which the autodialer was working. That's odd.
Normally I'd shrug and go back to whatever I was doing. But I was just getting over the flu, stuck at home on a rainy Saturday, bored to tears. I just had to try something. Something evil.
I selected the "Call Log" option on my phone, which brought up the last incoming number...the autodialer...then pressed "Dial." Of course, the number was busy...the autodialer was inflicting its annoying sales pitch on someone else at the moment, and would be doing that all day. And even if it wasn't, the autodialer isn't programmed to answer an incoming call. But...but...if I could time my call just right, I'd finish dialing just as the autodialer is picking up to make its next call. As I said, I'm stuck at home, nothing to do...so...hang up, redial, busy. Hang up, redial, busy. Lather, rinse, repeat. Then, after only about a minute of this...hang up, redial, sound of autodialer trying to dial the next number in its database! I managed to intercept it!
Like a dog that finally catches up with the rabbit, I wasn't exactly sure what to do with it now. I cleared my throat. Since this wasn't a SIT tone, nor a fax beep, the autodialer interpreted this as a voice "answering" the phone and delivered its prerecorded sales pitch. Feh.
When it got to the end of the recording, it then attempted to drop the line and dial the next number. However, in another one of those phone technicalities, this won't work because I had initiated the call; only I can drop the line. Due to the chance timing, the autodialer had answered my call. So I'm still connected to the autodialer, and hear it try to dial the next number, blissfully unaware that it doesn't even have a dial tone.
So I try another experiment. Though I'm still a bit scratchy with a sore throat, I whistle my best approximation of the ascending SIT tone. And immediately, the autodialer tries to drop the line and proceed with an
How dot they feel about unsolicited email? (Score:5, Informative)
Tim Searcy
Executive Director
tim@ataconnect.org
Bill Morris
Finance Director
bill@ataconnect.org
Lynne McCauley
Director of Member Services
lynne@ataconnect.org
Mitchell Roth
Government Affairs Counsel
mitch@ataconnect.org
Brad Rateike
Manager of Member Services
brad@ataconnect.org
Jason Perry
Marketing Manager
jason@ataconnect.org
Karl Jacobs
Manager of Special Projects
kjacobs@ataconnect.org
Robert Fanger
Manager of IT Systems
bobf@ataconnect.org
Re:I live in the UK, (Score:5, Funny)
I don't see any harm- they probably enjoy it as much as I do. At least, the AT&T rep thought it was pretty funny when I asked if I could get massages included in my long-distance plan...
Parent
Abusing telemarketers is ok (Score:5, Insightful)
Sure, it's kinda mean to fuck with them, but it's part of their job and it comes with the territory. It's up to them to determine if they are getting paid enough to deal with shit from angry people all day. And judging by the high turnover rate at call centers and telemarketing companies, my guess is that they definitely don't make enough money to deal with us.
So feel free to abuse telemarketers, they've been doing it to us for years.
Parent
WRONG (Score:5, Insightful)
Isn't that what the do-not-call list is made for? They could tell beforehand that you don't want them to call. But they insist they want to call you despite that and rule the list illegal. So, you're plainly wrong here.
Parent
To be crude but accurate: Bullshit! (Score:5, Insightful)
So you feel that the only Constitutionally protected form of speech should be commercial speech where the caller is trying to sell something? God forbid that a huge number of people call one of the telemarketing organizations and voice their opinion.
While my father was dying of cancer and I was awaiting "the call", I got a call from some jackass wanting to sell me vinyl replacement windows. When I was working night-shift testing satellites, I got multiple calls during the day from telemarketers who woke me up and kept me from getting adequate sleep. You think that these calls are valid forms of free speech which should exist unregulated but that me calling a business to tell them what I think of their lobbying efforts does not deserve those same protections?
I personally know an individual (a dentist) who has successfully used telemarketing. He employs one woman who works from home cold-calling people to get their teeth cleaned. Telemarketing has been the most successful method of getting new patients that he has ever tried. Additionally, the woman doing the job benefits from well paying at-home employment.
How is that any different than saying you know a successful penis enlargement pill salesman who employs people to send spam? I don't give a rat's ass about how successful he's been. It's like arguing that laws against embezzling are wrong because you know a successful embezzler.
I am not opposed to a Do Not Call list. I am, however, very much opposed to the legislation of said list.
So you think it's fine for people to register for the list but you don't think that telemarketers should be legally obliged to refrain from calling people on the list. Then, by extension, you believe that some handicapped or elderly person who has trouble and/or pain getting to the phone should be forced to receive telemarketing calls from any firm that wants to ignore the list. You think that people working night shift should have telemarketing calls wake them up in the middle of their sleep cycles. You believe that parents should have their toddlers woken up by telemarketing calls. You think that people should have to choose between taking the phone off of the hook and maybe missing an emergency telephone call or leaving it on the hook and being woken up, interrupted, or inconvenienced by some telemarketer.
You've got a screwed up set of priorities.
Parent
Re:Harassment (Score:5, Interesting)
When you pick up the phone to call ATA, what you are doing is harassment. You have nothing to sell them. In fact, you would almost certainly (with few exceptions) not be calling them unless you knew that thousands of your peers would also be calling. You hope that your actions will cause problems for the ATA. You are participating in mob behavior.
This isn't harassment. This is the American People(tm) making a democratic choice to call and offer their First Amendment right to make their voice heard, much like the ATA states that the First Amendment allows them to call us whenever, whereever. Harassment would be if we, oh, set up an autodialer and called them repeatedly with the intent to break the law/perform illegal activities. Again, it would be harassment if we started swearing, threatening, or performing other acts that the law would discriminate as "offensive". Simply calling a business to voice an opinion about something unpopular is by no means harassment.
By contrast, when a telemarketer calls you, they hope to sell you something. They have had success in this activity in the past, otherwise they would not try; the phone call costs money, as does the equipment, space, human resources staff, benefits, management, etc, not to mention the wages of those making the calls. They are not doing this to make you mad. They don't want to interrupt your dinner. If they could catch you at your most inconvenient time, they would. In fact, if they could tell without having to call that you were not interested, they would not make the call.
I don't know about you, but for every telemarkerter that has called me I have always told them (right noff the bat, before their little spiel) that I do not buy anything over the phone and to please remove my name from the list. I then hang up. (BTW, these are the actions one should take to, in theory, be removed from a list. It doesn't always work, however). Has this eliminated calls from telemerketers? Not in the least. As for the dinner comment, if these guys want to invest so much money into equipment and staffing, why not buy a map of the US marked off by area codes? This, with a little research saying that Americans typically eat dinner from, oh, 5:00 PM to 7:30 PM, would allow them to perhaps avoid those area codes during that time. It still gives them three other time zones to mess with at pretty much any given point.
I am not opposed to a Do Not Call list. I am, however, very much opposed to the legislation of said list. And I am opposed to the kind of mob behavior that caused the ATA to disconnect their phone line.
Again, you say mob behavior. This is not mob behavior, again it is the American People making their voice heard. What if 10,000 telemarketers calling tens of thousands of people called? Business? So it's business if you are paid to call people if they don't want to be called, but it is 'mob behavior' for us to call that company and complain?
And don't bother comparing this to calling your congressperson, they are supposed to hear from you and have budgets and staff explicitely for this purpose. Be honest now. If you called the ATA you weren't really trying to give them any information or state an opinion, you just wanted to inconvenience them. You were just happy for an opportunity to retaliate.
Perhaps you are confused. The ATA has a staff dedicated to answering calls such as these. It is called 'Customer Support', and many, if not most, companies have such a department. Their #1 priority is to handle complaints, comments, etc. from customers. And before you say we aren't customers, just remember that the phone ringing with "Unknown" or "Blocked" is due to some company trying to sell you something whether you like it or not. I am a customer, I never buy anything from them, they continue to call me, and I am fed up. It isn't mob behavior. It's me making my voice heard, and until someone abolishes the First Amendment we are more than welcome to do things such as this.
Parent
Re:Harassment (Score:5, Insightful)
When you pick up the phone to call ATA, what you are doing is harassment.
Only if you're harassing them. If you call them up and give them perfectly valid feedback, what are they going to do? "Uhhh.. yes, your honor. The defendant called us to let us know how much he hates it when he gets calls from us that he didn't ask for and has asked to have stopped on several occasions. He's a criminal!".
In fact, if they could tell without having to call that you were not interested, they would not make the call.
THAT is probably one of the biggest loads of horseshit I've seen posted on Slashdot in awhile. Part of selling cold is overcoming people's objections to something they hadn't actively sought before. They know that the overwhelming majority of people want nothing to do with the product - it's why they didn't seek it out to begin with. If they knew ahead of time who did and who didn't want the product, the only thing they would do is start ranking people by the likelihood of a purchase so they could target the victims better.
Don't give me shit about them just doing their jobs. My grandmother is 86 years old and she's always yelling at these bastards because they keep calling and trying to sell her shit and she keeps telling them to leave her alone. She just wants to be left alone, she doesn't need her windows replaced because she doesn't own a house. She doesn't need a new vaccuum cleaner. I don't care if they're "just doing their jobs" - they're doing it at her and my great inconvenience, and that's NOT acceptable.
I don't CARE if 2 million telemarketers get booted to the street. They almost all get paid shit anyway and are shoveled pretty much the same benefits as McDonalds' burger-flippers. They'll just fill other service positions that pay the same paltry amount but don't irritate people. If 2 million telemarketers lose their jobs, it's BECAUSE THE INDUSTRY DOESN'T HAVE A CUSTOMER BASE. Imagine that... an industry being allowed to die off because nobody wants to patronize it. What a novel idea in this country - fair competition. The only reason telemarketers have been allowed to survive this long is because they don't NEED to establish a customer base by providing a quality product or service, they just need to keep beating random people over the head and forcing almost everyone to be the customer base.
Long live the DNC list! The only complaints I have are that I can't sign up to avoid slimy politicians, guilt-inducing "charities", and religious nutjobs.
Parent
Re:How do you handle Telemarketers? (Score:5, Informative)
I was called once by a roofing service. When I said go away, they hung up... but their system didn't totally disconnect. I heard some other dialing and voices in the background, so after a minute I said hello. A different guy answered, called me by someone else's name, and started the same pitch. I was sooooo tempted to say "yes, please come give the free inspection, come in through the back, ok?"
Also, everyone please consider calling the number in my sigfile and leaving a generic complaint. An update on the situation: MBNA called me multiple times asking me if I wanted to change my card from an Audobon Society Platinum Visa (where the Society makes a tiny amount of profit) to some generic MBNA Platinum Mastercard. I told them no multiple times, and they finally stopped calling, but two days later I got a letter congratulating me on being "approved" for an "upgrade" from the Visa to the Mastercard. I guess they just decided they'd slam my account over so they could stop paying out to the Audobon Society.
Moral of the story: MBNA engages in devious practices, including slamming and using telemarketers who don't respect wishes of existing customers, and should be avoided.
Parent